May 24, 2023

Celebrating Older Americans Month

Celebrating Older Americans Month

seniors, aging, ageism, discrimination,

Setting It Straight w/ Ms. Gray is broadcast live Mondays at 7PM ET.

Setting It Straight w/ Ms. Gray TV Show is viewed on Talk 4 TV (www.talk4tv.com)

Setting It Straight w/ Ms. Gray Radio Show is broadcast...

iHeartRadio podcast player iconSpotify podcast player iconAmazon Music podcast player iconAudible podcast player iconPandora podcast player iconPodchaser podcast player iconSpreaker podcast player iconApple Podcasts podcast player iconAudacy podcast player iconYoutube Music podcast player iconTuneIn podcast player iconRSS Feed podcast player iconCastro podcast player iconOvercast podcast player iconPocketCasts podcast player iconCastamatic podcast player iconCastbox podcast player iconGoodpods podcast player iconPodcast Addict podcast player iconPodurama podcast player iconPodverse podcast player iconPodyssey podcast player icon
iHeartRadio podcast player iconSpotify podcast player iconAmazon Music podcast player iconAudible podcast player iconPandora podcast player iconPodchaser podcast player iconSpreaker podcast player iconApple Podcasts podcast player iconAudacy podcast player iconYoutube Music podcast player iconTuneIn podcast player iconRSS Feed podcast player iconCastro podcast player iconOvercast podcast player iconPocketCasts podcast player iconCastamatic podcast player iconCastbox podcast player iconGoodpods podcast player iconPodcast Addict podcast player iconPodurama podcast player iconPodverse podcast player iconPodyssey podcast player icon

seniors, aging, ageism, discrimination,

Setting It Straight w/ Ms. Gray is broadcast live Mondays at 7PM ET.

Setting It Straight w/ Ms. Gray TV Show is viewed on Talk 4 TV (www.talk4tv.com).

Setting It Straight w/ Ms. Gray Radio Show is broadcast on W4CY Radio (www.w4cy.com) part of Talk 4 Radio (www.talk4radio.com) on the Talk 4 Media Network (www.talk4media.com).

Setting It Straight w/ Ms. Gray Podcast is also available on Talk 4 Podcasting (www.talk4podcasting.com), iHeartRadio, Amazon Music, Pandora, Spotify, Audible, and over 100 other podcast outlets.

WEBVTT

1
00:00:07.080 --> 00:00:10.359
The topics and opinions expressed in the
following show are solely those of the hosts

2
00:00:10.359 --> 00:00:13.640
and their guests, and not those
of W FORCY Radio it's employees or affiliates.

3
00:00:13.839 --> 00:00:17.079
We make no recommendations or endorsements for
radio show, program, services,

4
00:00:17.160 --> 00:00:20.600
or products mentioned on air or on
our web. No liability, explicit or

5
00:00:20.640 --> 00:00:24.440
implied shall be extended to W Forcy
Radio or its employees or affiliates. Any

6
00:00:24.480 --> 00:00:27.920
questions or comments should be directed to
those show hosts. Thank you for choosing

7
00:00:28.079 --> 00:01:27.239
W FORCY Radio. Well, good
evening, Good evening, and welcome to

8
00:01:27.239 --> 00:01:34.719
another segment of Sending It Straight with
Miss Gray and co hosts. And tonight

9
00:01:34.799 --> 00:01:38.200
you see that tray tray is all
the way from Virginia. Hey, Trey,

10
00:01:38.319 --> 00:01:42.560
how are you? How's your wonderful
how are you? It's gone well

11
00:01:42.719 --> 00:01:47.760
gone, well, okay, okay, Yeah, it's been storming here,

12
00:01:48.640 --> 00:01:51.920
oh wild storming here. Yes,
But before we get started, let's pray.

13
00:01:51.959 --> 00:01:53.200
Father. We just thank you and
we praise you. We give you

14
00:01:53.280 --> 00:01:57.000
glory, for you alone are worth
it to be praised. We thank you,

15
00:01:57.079 --> 00:02:00.920
Father God for this day. We
thank you for your glory, We

16
00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:04.319
thank you for your mercy. We
thank you for your unconditional love. We

17
00:02:04.400 --> 00:02:07.759
thank you for your peace that passes
all understanding. We thank you for your

18
00:02:07.800 --> 00:02:13.199
favor. We thank you for your
mercy and your grace, your goodness and

19
00:02:13.360 --> 00:02:17.560
your love. And we thank you
for all that you've given us, all

20
00:02:17.599 --> 00:02:23.560
that you've allowed us to experience,
whether it was good, bad, or

21
00:02:23.680 --> 00:02:29.560
indifferent, we know that you were
there all the time. Now tonight,

22
00:02:29.599 --> 00:02:32.280
Lord, this is your show.
We are your people. Tray and I

23
00:02:32.360 --> 00:02:37.479
get behind the cross. We let
you do what you do best, setting

24
00:02:37.560 --> 00:02:40.759
your captors free. All this and
will be asked in Jesus name, Amen

25
00:02:42.039 --> 00:02:46.400
and amen. Well, yes,
it has been storming here, a natural

26
00:02:46.560 --> 00:02:51.439
storm. I mean, forget it. I know that forever we've always wanted

27
00:02:51.439 --> 00:02:57.120
to talk about. June first is
hurricane season. I think now we can

28
00:02:57.520 --> 00:03:02.879
let it go. We can let
it go because it starts up whenever it

29
00:03:02.960 --> 00:03:08.719
wants to. We've been having tornadoes
here, and these tornadoes are ruthless.

30
00:03:09.960 --> 00:03:14.680
They are ripping trees out of the
ground. This is not hurricane this is

31
00:03:14.800 --> 00:03:20.080
tornadic weather, and it is It's
a very scary thing. I'm so glad

32
00:03:20.159 --> 00:03:22.879
that with my building, the Lord
told me to go in. I saw

33
00:03:22.960 --> 00:03:28.159
these branches hanging over the business next
door to me. There's another set of

34
00:03:28.199 --> 00:03:32.080
branches from the same tree that was
touching the power lines, the cable line

35
00:03:32.199 --> 00:03:37.960
and the electric line. I called
for the electrical company, never got back

36
00:03:38.000 --> 00:03:40.919
to me. God sent me a
great handyman. He said I can do

37
00:03:42.000 --> 00:03:44.520
it. I said, thank you, and he I know that. The

38
00:03:45.520 --> 00:03:47.639
business next door to me came in
on Monday and said, oh God,

39
00:03:49.080 --> 00:03:53.159
the trees are gone. Yes,
because I don't want that liability. I

40
00:03:53.199 --> 00:03:59.000
don't want any tree being I mean
lightning striking tree limbs, not no little

41
00:03:59.080 --> 00:04:03.240
limb tree limbs and look like somebody
hacked in it, ripped it off,

42
00:04:03.360 --> 00:04:10.639
like the Jolly Green Giant came or
either of King Kong and ripped the tree,

43
00:04:12.960 --> 00:04:16.879
ripping, ripped it. I'm like, I'm going there's trees that are

44
00:04:16.959 --> 00:04:23.720
out just uprooted from the ground.
And this is not an all nighter.

45
00:04:24.519 --> 00:04:28.720
This is just a few hours of
rain and toward that, you know,

46
00:04:29.120 --> 00:04:33.279
lightning that sounds like it's like it's
breaking the ground. So people, you

47
00:04:33.399 --> 00:04:36.800
need you know you you're gonna have
to really use wisdom on this one.

48
00:04:38.319 --> 00:04:44.480
America unfortunately has to pay for her
sins and it's in the weather. The

49
00:04:44.639 --> 00:04:48.759
weather is speaking for itself. The
weather is speaking. We've got strange creatures

50
00:04:49.319 --> 00:04:56.560
showing up in waters and on lands
that don't that's they're way away from home.

51
00:04:57.480 --> 00:05:00.240
They're way away from home, and
all they're doing is fighting them and

52
00:05:00.319 --> 00:05:04.480
stuff. And then here in Florida, we got alligators just coming up,

53
00:05:04.839 --> 00:05:10.279
coming up in people back yard and
I'm thinking that they on the food.

54
00:05:10.319 --> 00:05:13.720
They don't have enough to eat,
so that it drives them out of the

55
00:05:13.800 --> 00:05:17.600
water and they're looking for something to
eat. Bears. I know that we've

56
00:05:17.639 --> 00:05:21.639
had a lot of construction in these
woods out of no Central Florida had it

57
00:05:21.759 --> 00:05:28.959
so many bear infestations. But mama
bear, baby bears, daddy bears,

58
00:05:29.120 --> 00:05:33.720
I mean black bears are in Central
Florida, and they go up the tree

59
00:05:33.759 --> 00:05:38.040
and look at you like what you're
gonna do, You're gonna come and get

60
00:05:38.079 --> 00:05:41.920
me out the tree, and then
eating the leaves and everything else. These

61
00:05:42.040 --> 00:05:46.839
animals are hungry, so you can't
take them in for as a pet.

62
00:05:47.360 --> 00:05:54.680
You can't say, oh here,
no cats. Faral cats everywhere down everywhere

63
00:05:54.800 --> 00:05:57.639
now, and I believe some of
them are not just feral cats. I

64
00:05:57.720 --> 00:06:00.480
think people just let their animals walk
out at the door, put them outside,

65
00:06:01.399 --> 00:06:04.439
and when and if you're feeding these
stray animals, they're gonna stay right

66
00:06:04.480 --> 00:06:09.480
there where they're being fed. So
don't don't get that twisted. I've never

67
00:06:09.560 --> 00:06:15.000
heard of the shelters being as full
as they were from Katrina days. I

68
00:06:15.120 --> 00:06:19.920
thought it slowed down because animals were
displaced. Now we've got animals all around,

69
00:06:20.720 --> 00:06:29.079
especially these cats and some dogs.
So if you don't think that we're

70
00:06:29.160 --> 00:06:32.160
not in a last days, then
you're fooling yourself. If you don't think

71
00:06:32.199 --> 00:06:36.639
this climate change is out there,
then you're fooling yourself. And just keep

72
00:06:36.720 --> 00:06:42.079
your opinion to yourself, because I
don't know what more proof you need to

73
00:06:42.279 --> 00:06:46.560
know that the world is changing on
its own. So that was not what

74
00:06:46.680 --> 00:06:51.000
I was gonna We're talking about tonight. This is Older Americans Month, one

75
00:06:51.040 --> 00:06:57.120
of my favorite populations. Actually a
lot of my work, my nonprofit work,

76
00:06:57.160 --> 00:07:02.959
will be with dealing with my Americans, my Black American seniors, especially

77
00:07:03.680 --> 00:07:08.480
because I just feel that you know
they've lost that. You find families,

78
00:07:08.519 --> 00:07:14.399
You find elders who don't have family, You find people who never had children,

79
00:07:14.800 --> 00:07:17.759
they only had their siblings or their
cousins, and all those people are

80
00:07:17.839 --> 00:07:23.120
gone and they're trying to maintain in
their homes. They're trying to make do.

81
00:07:23.759 --> 00:07:26.959
If they have a pet, that
pet's gonna get more attention than they

82
00:07:27.000 --> 00:07:30.480
are. It is true, because
they will sacrifice whatever limited income they have

83
00:07:30.959 --> 00:07:36.160
to make sure their pets are fed
because that's the only living thing that keeps

84
00:07:36.199 --> 00:07:43.360
them company, that loves them unconditionally, that gives them the opportunity to talk

85
00:07:43.439 --> 00:07:46.160
with them. I mean, I
have my dog, she's over a year

86
00:07:46.199 --> 00:07:47.480
old. I talk to her all
the time, and she just be sitting

87
00:07:47.519 --> 00:07:50.680
there looking at me. I think
she understands what I'll be talking to her

88
00:07:50.720 --> 00:07:55.680
all the time. And I've got
family here, you know, But older

89
00:07:55.720 --> 00:08:00.360
Americans, I want to share some
scriptures with you first and foremost on how

90
00:08:01.240 --> 00:08:07.199
the respectability still needs to be maintained. I know other cultures highly highly esteemed

91
00:08:07.240 --> 00:08:13.319
their elders, highly esteemed their elders, and there's some cultures who've kind of

92
00:08:13.399 --> 00:08:20.360
lost it because they've moved away,
they've they have higher education, and and

93
00:08:20.879 --> 00:08:24.959
you know, they just don't seemingly
have the time for their loved ones.

94
00:08:24.439 --> 00:08:28.600
And you have to be very careful
about that. So I want to share

95
00:08:28.680 --> 00:08:31.159
some scriptures and the tray. I
need you to come on in and stables

96
00:08:31.240 --> 00:08:35.519
on your heart as well. So
Leviticus chapter nineteen, verse thirty two,

97
00:08:35.559 --> 00:08:41.320
thou'll share, rise up before the
hoary head and honor the face of the

98
00:08:41.440 --> 00:08:46.080
old man, and fear thy God. I am the Lord. And I'm

99
00:08:46.120 --> 00:08:50.240
gonna go and find a few more
want to share. There's one I'm gonna

100
00:08:50.240 --> 00:08:56.799
share at the very end. And
again we're talking about paying honor to our

101
00:08:56.879 --> 00:09:01.039
elderly. This is older America's a
month and it's should be forever. And

102
00:09:01.080 --> 00:09:05.440
I want to talk about some other
trends that has a main trend that started

103
00:09:05.519 --> 00:09:09.159
even before twenty twenty in our church, especially the Black church. And I'm

104
00:09:09.200 --> 00:09:13.080
gonna talk about that. So let's
go to Isaiah four to six and four

105
00:09:13.639 --> 00:09:18.039
even and even to your old age, I am he. This is God's

106
00:09:18.080 --> 00:09:22.639
speaking, And even to the whore
hairs h a r hairs. Will I

107
00:09:22.799 --> 00:09:26.799
carry you? I made you,
and I will bear even, I will

108
00:09:26.919 --> 00:09:31.159
carry and will deliver you to whom
you like and to me, make me

109
00:09:31.320 --> 00:09:35.639
equal and compare me that there'd be
none like. Who are you comparing me

110
00:09:35.759 --> 00:09:39.440
to? This is God's speaking,
and mainly to Isaiah, you know,

111
00:09:39.600 --> 00:09:43.519
and and and to the house of
Jacob. Let's see. Let me go

112
00:09:43.600 --> 00:09:48.159
to a New Testament scripture. This
was a good one here um first Timothy

113
00:09:50.559 --> 00:09:56.559
five and verses one through two,
rebuke not an elder, but entreat him

114
00:09:56.600 --> 00:10:01.679
as a father, and the younger
men as brethren, and the elder women

115
00:10:01.120 --> 00:10:07.440
as mothers, the younger sisters with
all purity. Let verse three honor widows

116
00:10:07.759 --> 00:10:11.639
that are widows. Indeed, but
if any widow have children or nephews,

117
00:10:11.759 --> 00:10:16.519
let them learn first to show piety
at home and to requite their parents,

118
00:10:16.799 --> 00:10:22.159
for that is good and acceptable before
God. God is watching you. Now.

119
00:10:22.240 --> 00:10:26.519
I know there's a lot of historical
things going on in families that are

120
00:10:26.639 --> 00:10:31.720
unforgivable. I get it. I
get it. But if you've got a

121
00:10:31.840 --> 00:10:35.919
senior and I've always said this,
if you are an adult child and you

122
00:10:35.080 --> 00:10:41.600
have an adult parents still living there
your responsibility. You've got to cross that

123
00:10:41.759 --> 00:10:45.600
bridge one way or the other,
one way or the other. And then

124
00:10:45.600 --> 00:10:48.720
I'm gonna go straight to Deuteronomy because
I want Trader come on in here and

125
00:10:50.360 --> 00:10:56.080
share some thoughts too. Deuteronomy five
or sixteen. Five and sixteen these are

126
00:10:56.080 --> 00:11:01.360
the commandments, and here it goes
honor thy Father and thy mother, as

127
00:11:01.399 --> 00:11:05.840
the Lord thy God hath commanded THEE
that thy days may be prolonged, and

128
00:11:05.000 --> 00:11:09.200
that it may go well with THEE
in the land which the Lord thy God

129
00:11:09.480 --> 00:11:13.840
giveth THEE. I understand, like
I said, there's issues. There are

130
00:11:13.919 --> 00:11:18.679
family secrets. There are family families
that I know that were not protected.

131
00:11:18.720 --> 00:11:24.279
There were a lot of ancestral things, nasty things going on in families.

132
00:11:24.399 --> 00:11:28.159
I get it, and I'm we're
so sorry for that. But you cannot

133
00:11:28.559 --> 00:11:33.919
live within that. You can't because
what it does is if there's a seed,

134
00:11:35.080 --> 00:11:39.559
now I'm to put my therapeutic hat
on. If there are unresolved issues,

135
00:11:39.360 --> 00:11:45.879
it becomes a seed. It's a
seed as emotional emotions are attached to

136
00:11:46.000 --> 00:11:50.240
it, Neurons are attached to it, behavioral traits, characteristics are attached to

137
00:11:50.320 --> 00:11:54.440
it. It plants itself in the
back, somewhere behind the spleen, underneath

138
00:11:54.440 --> 00:12:00.200
the kidney. It just stays there
and it festers, It grows, and

139
00:12:00.279 --> 00:12:07.360
then it provides itself a root that
you can't move it. But it affects

140
00:12:07.600 --> 00:12:13.120
every part of your human interaction with
other people and within yourself. You have

141
00:12:13.360 --> 00:12:18.240
to forgive, you have to put
it in a vault where it don't hurt,

142
00:12:18.600 --> 00:12:24.519
where it don't affect, and you
don't have to necessarily they've been there's

143
00:12:24.519 --> 00:12:28.200
a few people that I've had to
forgive before they passed away, and there's

144
00:12:28.279 --> 00:12:31.440
some one or two that's still living. And God would say, you forgive

145
00:12:31.519 --> 00:12:35.360
them in front of me. I
don't have to pick up the phone and

146
00:12:35.440 --> 00:12:37.960
call them. I don't have to
have them in my life. But I

147
00:12:39.039 --> 00:12:41.639
said, Lord, I forgive such
and such. I had to do that

148
00:12:41.759 --> 00:12:46.840
a lot with my husband who's deceased, had to do that over the years

149
00:12:46.200 --> 00:12:52.159
because it was still little pieces remnants
if you would charge, if you would,

150
00:12:52.120 --> 00:12:56.639
something would wake up a memory and
I'd be like, oh my God,

151
00:12:56.679 --> 00:12:58.120
why can't I get this man out
of my head? And all the

152
00:12:58.720 --> 00:13:05.240
you know, the mist treating and
everything else, the psychological abuse and everything.

153
00:13:05.519 --> 00:13:09.240
But I've had to forgive it because
I can't take that into any relationship.

154
00:13:11.159 --> 00:13:16.320
That's baggage. That's baggage. When
you've not been able to forgive somebody,

155
00:13:16.399 --> 00:13:18.840
that's baggage, and you take it, take it where ever you go,

156
00:13:20.039 --> 00:13:26.200
trade talk to us. Wow,
that's that's a great, great stought,

157
00:13:26.360 --> 00:13:31.440
Lysia. But um, what I
want to do. It's how fitting.

158
00:13:31.600 --> 00:13:35.519
So I today and right now want
to just say happy having a birthday

159
00:13:35.559 --> 00:13:39.399
to my father. He would have
been ninety two. So this is our

160
00:13:39.519 --> 00:13:43.679
first birthday without him, and him
without us. But you know, we

161
00:13:43.799 --> 00:13:48.960
know he's up there with my mom
and they are, you know, dancing,

162
00:13:48.039 --> 00:13:52.960
they love to dance, and you
know they're up there with family and

163
00:13:52.159 --> 00:13:56.759
other friends that had gone before them. So that's the way I have to

164
00:13:56.840 --> 00:14:01.080
look at it, and like it's
up until last year, we were his

165
00:14:01.360 --> 00:14:05.639
caregivers. So definitely wanted to make
sure that he had all that he needed

166
00:14:05.799 --> 00:14:09.720
while he was here. And I'm
pretty sure my mom was was living that

167
00:14:09.879 --> 00:14:13.799
she passed twenty years prior to him, that she would have wanted the same

168
00:14:13.919 --> 00:14:18.639
thing for us, to make sure
he was he was good. So you

169
00:14:18.720 --> 00:14:20.960
know, his daughters did it,
you know, and made sure he was

170
00:14:20.039 --> 00:14:26.320
all right and so put him away
the way he lived. Nothing solemn.

171
00:14:26.440 --> 00:14:31.320
The occasion was solemn because we missed
him, but the service itself was befitting

172
00:14:31.360 --> 00:14:37.240
of him. And so but just
just thinking about that, and then you

173
00:14:37.320 --> 00:14:41.759
know, people my peers now are
taking care of their parents. You know,

174
00:14:41.080 --> 00:14:46.360
some of them only had the one
parent living and so they're doing the

175
00:14:46.440 --> 00:14:50.960
best to take care of that parent, and I'm also trying to, you

176
00:14:50.039 --> 00:14:54.519
know, take care of the children
and other work and things, other things

177
00:14:54.600 --> 00:15:00.720
that come along with that. So
it's definitely, you know, I do

178
00:15:00.879 --> 00:15:07.320
believe that should be there for your
parents, you know, honor that mother

179
00:15:07.360 --> 00:15:11.759
and my father. So I do
believe that. So I think we've done

180
00:15:11.840 --> 00:15:16.320
that and and just now just just
trying to carry on in the way that

181
00:15:18.279 --> 00:15:22.879
they would have us too, you
know, not to pity and wallow and

182
00:15:22.639 --> 00:15:28.039
you know, we stuck, you
know, because they're okay, it's us

183
00:15:28.120 --> 00:15:31.279
that we were. We worry about
stuff, like you said, with a

184
00:15:31.720 --> 00:15:37.919
climate change, you know, the
animals just appearing out of nowhere. People

185
00:15:39.039 --> 00:15:43.200
the way they're treating each other,
it's it's it's ridiculous. And so we

186
00:15:43.360 --> 00:15:48.240
definitely need to stay prayed up,
Pray for strength, Pray for comfort,

187
00:15:48.279 --> 00:15:50.159
Pray for your neighbor, Pray for
the people that you don't care for.

188
00:15:52.080 --> 00:15:54.840
I don't like to say, hey, that's a strong word, but people

189
00:15:54.879 --> 00:15:58.440
that you don't care for, and
learn to let some things go because if

190
00:15:58.480 --> 00:16:00.919
you hold on to it doesn't I
think, but drag you down, make

191
00:16:00.960 --> 00:16:07.559
you feel you know, ill and
just does more to you. So just

192
00:16:07.799 --> 00:16:12.000
encouraging everybody to pray, pray for
strength and forgiveness of self too. And

193
00:16:12.120 --> 00:16:15.360
sometimes you have to forgive yourself because
sometimes you can be your own worst enemy

194
00:16:17.120 --> 00:16:19.519
and you know, blame yourself for
a lot of stuff. So I'm just

195
00:16:21.320 --> 00:16:29.159
trying to incorporate that that wellness pieces
as well. And so but yes,

196
00:16:29.440 --> 00:16:33.840
definitely just wish there were resources for
our seniors. You know, there should

197
00:16:33.879 --> 00:16:37.720
be no senior that's homeless, there
should be no senior that's hungry, and

198
00:16:37.879 --> 00:16:41.000
I wish there were no senior that
was alone, you know, and I

199
00:16:41.159 --> 00:16:45.159
know some places are doing shared housing. It's almost like the Golden Girls concept,

200
00:16:45.279 --> 00:16:49.320
you know, everybody pitching in a
little bit like a partnership. Can't

201
00:16:49.320 --> 00:16:52.080
afford the house by yourself, but
bringing other people that you might have,

202
00:16:53.360 --> 00:17:00.080
things that you're having common and creating
an environment like that, especially for our

203
00:17:00.159 --> 00:17:06.640
seen so maybe they won't have to
go into assistant livings or places that are

204
00:17:06.720 --> 00:17:11.359
not that I'm not the best.
So so that's one of the things I

205
00:17:11.440 --> 00:17:17.240
want to add amen to that.
And and my son just came in,

206
00:17:17.400 --> 00:17:21.200
so, uh, my baby's reacting
because she can't get to him, so

207
00:17:21.599 --> 00:17:26.400
please excuse me for the dog barking
and whining. She's okay, amen,

208
00:17:26.599 --> 00:17:30.440
but he's all right, thank you. But you know, yeah, Trey,

209
00:17:30.920 --> 00:17:33.279
I am so blessed that because I
took care of my parents, both

210
00:17:33.359 --> 00:17:37.759
of them, um, and and
and did it with joy and and and

211
00:17:38.119 --> 00:17:44.079
you know, um didn't even expect
anybody and wasn't looking for any help,

212
00:17:44.119 --> 00:17:47.759
even though I had another sister.
But she You know, everybody makes their

213
00:17:47.839 --> 00:17:52.200
decisions and they go their way,
and I take nothing for it. I

214
00:17:52.279 --> 00:17:56.640
can do it with my eyes closed. I can do it with limbs missing.

215
00:17:56.000 --> 00:17:59.960
I can if you need. I've
helped other people. I've helped client.

216
00:18:00.680 --> 00:18:03.640
My case slow when I worked at
the mental health facility was that of

217
00:18:04.160 --> 00:18:08.640
seniors and everything else and um,
and that was my main thing. Hang

218
00:18:08.720 --> 00:18:21.920
on a minute, and there goes
my screen and anyway, we can do

219
00:18:22.039 --> 00:18:26.519
this this way, um, but
hey god, we will make a way

220
00:18:26.559 --> 00:18:32.720
out of no way now because y'all
yeah, keep moving, look to the

221
00:18:32.920 --> 00:18:37.319
moving, keep the moving. Yeah
you do, yes, but um yeah,

222
00:18:37.440 --> 00:18:40.480
And and and to be able to
look back at that and to see

223
00:18:41.000 --> 00:18:45.440
that that commandment carried that much weight, You know that your days may be

224
00:18:45.640 --> 00:18:52.680
long. It's big, um,
you know, honor your mother and your

225
00:18:52.720 --> 00:18:55.279
father, and I want to I
think I've said this before. Now,

226
00:18:55.319 --> 00:18:59.519
I know some people get that really
mixed up because there have been some parents

227
00:18:59.599 --> 00:19:03.720
who not let the past go and
are buried. They've grown older, crotchety

228
00:19:03.799 --> 00:19:08.759
and mean and saying some things and
not letting the past go and all that.

229
00:19:08.960 --> 00:19:14.240
So then that adult child is having
difficulty trying to move past this.

230
00:19:14.400 --> 00:19:17.160
But they know that they want to
do the right thing. Well, the

231
00:19:17.359 --> 00:19:22.759
right thing may be able to get
them a caregiver, maybe able to get

232
00:19:22.799 --> 00:19:26.279
them some respect, may be able
to place them. My mom, I

233
00:19:26.440 --> 00:19:30.920
had to place her because I mean, but the Alzheimer's, you know,

234
00:19:32.079 --> 00:19:36.359
she lost control of even her faculties
as far as going to the bathroom.

235
00:19:37.559 --> 00:19:41.200
And I had unsavory cousins who knew
that my mom did not her memory was

236
00:19:41.279 --> 00:19:45.480
gone. So I come home at
lunchtime and the garage doors up. There's

237
00:19:45.519 --> 00:19:49.519
no reason for that to be up. Then I noticed towels are missing.

238
00:19:49.559 --> 00:19:53.319
I noticed things in the house are
missing. So I had no choice.

239
00:19:53.880 --> 00:19:57.480
I had to work. I had
a baby, I was married. I

240
00:19:57.599 --> 00:20:02.440
had to work, so I had
no choice. I contacted some colleagues,

241
00:20:02.720 --> 00:20:06.279
some of my colleagues who are in
the assistant living business, and I said,

242
00:20:06.319 --> 00:20:08.079
can you take my mom in This
is the only income she has.

243
00:20:08.559 --> 00:20:11.359
And then like, okay, not
a problem because they remember me from back

244
00:20:11.400 --> 00:20:17.000
in the day. Never burn your
bridges. You don't know what. You

245
00:20:17.039 --> 00:20:18.359
don't know when you're gonna be.
You know you're gonna you don't know where

246
00:20:18.359 --> 00:20:22.079
you're gonna need people. Go ahead, tray Yeah, you know, speaking

247
00:20:22.160 --> 00:20:26.519
on that too, I think maybe
trying to come up with resources, because

248
00:20:26.680 --> 00:20:32.480
sometimes you have to do what you
have to do. And and the thing

249
00:20:32.759 --> 00:20:37.640
is is it kind of push you
between a rock and a hard place where

250
00:20:37.640 --> 00:20:41.759
you have to make a decision like
that. You know, you had a

251
00:20:41.960 --> 00:20:45.240
you know, a child. I
didn't have any, and so schedules are

252
00:20:45.319 --> 00:20:52.720
different. My schedule was very fortunate
that I was able to to work around

253
00:20:52.880 --> 00:20:55.240
it. You know, I was
an independent contractor, so I was able

254
00:20:55.319 --> 00:20:57.240
to make it work. But there
are a lot of people that that don't

255
00:20:57.319 --> 00:21:02.599
have that luxury. So I was
blessed. And like I said, you

256
00:21:02.680 --> 00:21:06.559
have to do what makes it work
for you. And I just wish that

257
00:21:07.720 --> 00:21:14.119
the insurances, especially Medicare, would
would would step up their game because it's

258
00:21:14.279 --> 00:21:18.880
limited what they will provide as far
as support and and and the thing is

259
00:21:18.960 --> 00:21:22.359
they're quick to let you go into
a home and take everything you have,

260
00:21:23.240 --> 00:21:26.839
but if you could just they could
just provide the support if there's a home

261
00:21:27.559 --> 00:21:33.200
for the parent to be, and
just bring in resources into the home,

262
00:21:33.480 --> 00:21:37.400
you know what I mean. And
because I've seen some of those places,

263
00:21:37.559 --> 00:21:41.559
you know, system livings and nursing
homes, and I tell you, it's

264
00:21:41.599 --> 00:21:45.200
a scary thing. It's a scary
thing. And I have friends, Like

265
00:21:45.240 --> 00:21:48.960
I said, I have friends right
now that are caregivers and and that's a

266
00:21:48.039 --> 00:21:52.839
scary thing for them, you know. Um, but I just wish that

267
00:21:52.160 --> 00:22:00.599
that the insurances or Medicare would offer
a little more, especially if you know,

268
00:22:00.799 --> 00:22:08.039
with aid coming into the home or
uh you know, other other resources

269
00:22:08.920 --> 00:22:14.319
that are limited because they're not going
to pay. But but so much and

270
00:22:14.640 --> 00:22:17.000
uh, I was, you know, we were very fortunately because my dad

271
00:22:17.160 --> 00:22:22.119
was was military try military, so
we were able to pull those resources,

272
00:22:22.200 --> 00:22:26.440
which were better than not trying to
put anything down. But it was better

273
00:22:26.559 --> 00:22:33.839
than the other because he benefited more
from having both and we were able to

274
00:22:33.960 --> 00:22:37.880
supplement where one wasn't able to do
so, Like I said that, maybe

275
00:22:37.960 --> 00:22:41.519
I just need to figure it out, or maybe he has a resources because

276
00:22:41.559 --> 00:22:45.240
I know there are people out there. They are taking care of our family

277
00:22:45.359 --> 00:22:51.279
members, whether they're older or whether
they you know, uh, you know,

278
00:22:51.640 --> 00:22:53.440
handed the child that the parent couldn't
take care of, you know,

279
00:22:53.680 --> 00:23:00.119
grandparents raising the grandchildren, or siblings
raising their nieces and nephews, sibling older

280
00:23:00.200 --> 00:23:04.480
siblings raised on a younger sibling.
It just needs to just try to figure

281
00:23:04.519 --> 00:23:10.440
out how we can help them,
you know, because it's tough. It's

282
00:23:10.519 --> 00:23:15.720
tough, and it's taxing, and
it could be you know, financially taxing,

283
00:23:15.839 --> 00:23:21.000
emotionally and mentally taxing, and just
trying to find ways to to be

284
00:23:21.119 --> 00:23:26.720
able to bring more resources for families. You have to be very careful how

285
00:23:26.960 --> 00:23:30.880
you tread. I know a families
that were well off and they depended on

286
00:23:30.960 --> 00:23:38.200
their living parents a whole lot to
where they exhausted their their savings and things

287
00:23:38.319 --> 00:23:41.599
like that. Right so here it
is now you've been you've taken all the

288
00:23:41.680 --> 00:23:45.079
money because you've asked for a house, you asked for a car. They

289
00:23:45.119 --> 00:23:47.759
had to bail you out of jail. They're not They had to go into

290
00:23:47.799 --> 00:23:51.440
their four or one K, or
their savings that they were hoping to save

291
00:23:51.680 --> 00:23:56.319
so that you wouldn't have to be
burdened. They saved and they put money

292
00:23:56.359 --> 00:24:00.240
away so you wouldn't have to be
burdened. But you've gone, you've you

293
00:24:00.400 --> 00:24:03.079
went through that. So now you're
kind of old them, and you need

294
00:24:03.160 --> 00:24:07.319
to be. If you got a
sibling, a sister or whatever, you've

295
00:24:07.319 --> 00:24:10.599
got a relative that can stay there, and then you need there comes the

296
00:24:10.680 --> 00:24:15.279
time you need to have the conversation
with your siblings. Okay, we're noticing

297
00:24:15.400 --> 00:24:19.759
something here. Mom is not as
agile and her memory is really going here.

298
00:24:19.960 --> 00:24:22.799
All right, so this is what
we're gonna do. There's seven of

299
00:24:22.960 --> 00:24:29.400
us, so we should put it
in twenty five dollars every paycheck, even

300
00:24:29.440 --> 00:24:32.119
if it's once a month. Let's
start. Let's get ahead of this thing.

301
00:24:32.759 --> 00:24:36.720
Don't wait until your mother gets in
the car and she's driving and then

302
00:24:36.799 --> 00:24:40.960
she calls her he says, I'm
lost. Don't don't wait till then start

303
00:24:41.039 --> 00:24:45.119
having a conversation. Now you see
what mom's going through. What we're gonna

304
00:24:45.160 --> 00:24:48.680
do. First of all, we
may need to get somebody in here at

305
00:24:48.759 --> 00:24:52.240
least three days a week, because
none of us are staying at the house,

306
00:24:52.799 --> 00:24:56.400
right, So with Mama's house need
to be clean. So what we

307
00:24:56.559 --> 00:24:59.680
need to do is rotate every weekend, we come in here and clean the

308
00:24:59.759 --> 00:25:03.400
house. We take terms. There
are seven of us living in the same

309
00:25:03.559 --> 00:25:08.319
city as Mom. Okay, so
you start having these conversations with your siblings.

310
00:25:10.160 --> 00:25:15.119
All right, put twenty five dollars
in the pot away for just whatever.

311
00:25:15.319 --> 00:25:18.079
Then all of a sudden, Moms, you know, she can't hold

312
00:25:18.680 --> 00:25:22.279
her yearing, she can't hold herself. She's she's having leakage issues. Well,

313
00:25:22.640 --> 00:25:29.160
start going to get on CBS Rewards
Club. You're on Public Rewards Club.

314
00:25:29.480 --> 00:25:33.079
You can get discounts on those things. Contact the area agency on aging.

315
00:25:33.519 --> 00:25:38.559
Contact your church. And speaking of
church, I'm gonna bring that up

316
00:25:38.559 --> 00:25:44.119
in a minute, but Cotton,
start talking and start getting filtering around.

317
00:25:44.200 --> 00:25:48.440
I just told my classmates on a
town hall meeting earlier this month. Look,

318
00:25:48.559 --> 00:25:53.799
guys, there's no there's no You've
got to be creative now for services

319
00:25:55.319 --> 00:25:59.440
that it's done. Don't go looking
for no box thinking outside no box that's

320
00:25:59.599 --> 00:26:03.480
done, that's never existed. You've
got to go back in look at your

321
00:26:03.559 --> 00:26:08.319
community here in Central Florida. First, Baptist Church is buried is a very

322
00:26:08.400 --> 00:26:14.799
good resource, and they went several
years ago and was awarded over a million

323
00:26:14.880 --> 00:26:19.759
dollars grant. They hired a social
worker in the church to meet the needs.

324
00:26:21.799 --> 00:26:23.920
Okay, so now you go to
your church. You've been going there,

325
00:26:25.440 --> 00:26:27.759
you've been faithful with your tithe and
your offering any time the door is

326
00:26:27.799 --> 00:26:32.559
open. Now you got to go
and talk to the pastor and to the

327
00:26:32.640 --> 00:26:36.559
pastor assistant. I say I need
some help, I need some resources,

328
00:26:37.440 --> 00:26:42.519
I need some supplies. I don't
have supplies. I had an assistant living

329
00:26:42.559 --> 00:26:48.240
facility, a sixteen big facility that
I operated for three years. My biggest,

330
00:26:48.279 --> 00:26:55.759
the biggest, the biggest difference from
the former owner was everybody. Nobody

331
00:26:55.839 --> 00:27:00.079
could be in the house Monday through
Friday till after three o'clock. Everybody.

332
00:27:00.160 --> 00:27:03.160
You can, if you're able to
go to work, go to work.

333
00:27:03.319 --> 00:27:06.279
If you can't go to Goodwill or
go to some of these supplemental places,

334
00:27:06.519 --> 00:27:10.599
then you go to day treatment.
But you're not going to stay here during

335
00:27:10.640 --> 00:27:12.640
the day and go and go to
the convenience store and get you a bit.

336
00:27:12.720 --> 00:27:18.119
Now we are having at it's a
new sheriff in town. But there's

337
00:27:18.200 --> 00:27:21.319
things that you can do, and
you got to garnish your resources now.

338
00:27:21.440 --> 00:27:25.559
So you call on churches and I
mean they may be able to just they

339
00:27:25.599 --> 00:27:27.119
could go by to supplies. They
don't have to give you cash money,

340
00:27:29.200 --> 00:27:32.720
but if you need diapers, or
if you need, you know, help

341
00:27:32.759 --> 00:27:37.640
with the medication. Even because it's
it's getting crazier, it's getting crazier.

342
00:27:37.839 --> 00:27:41.680
But you got to have the conversation
with your siblings. I think I shared

343
00:27:41.759 --> 00:27:48.400
with you all. One of my
home health physical therapists would come and I

344
00:27:48.680 --> 00:27:51.680
was like, I wo was just
share stories with what I've done over the

345
00:27:51.759 --> 00:27:53.359
years and stuff. And I said, you know what. She said,

346
00:27:53.400 --> 00:27:56.960
you know what, miss Gray,
I thank you. She's from the Philippines

347
00:27:56.079 --> 00:28:00.400
originally, but she hadn't been home
in a while, so they she and

348
00:28:00.519 --> 00:28:04.920
her brother and the kids and their
spouses were going home to the Philippines.

349
00:28:06.759 --> 00:28:08.559
And I said, okay, now, Marie, you gotta you know,

350
00:28:10.480 --> 00:28:12.680
maybe this is a great time for
you to have a conversation with your parents.

351
00:28:12.799 --> 00:28:18.240
Now they're getting up an age and
you know, nobody's their family wise,

352
00:28:18.279 --> 00:28:21.640
they just their siblings. You got
to have that conversation. She said,

353
00:28:21.720 --> 00:28:23.039
I'm kind of nervous because you know, my mom don't like to talk

354
00:28:23.079 --> 00:28:27.000
about things. I'm telling you,
look at God. When she got back

355
00:28:27.039 --> 00:28:30.640
here, she said, Miss Graftin
hard await to come and sit visit with

356
00:28:30.759 --> 00:28:33.119
you. She said, you were
right, and guess what my mother brought

357
00:28:33.200 --> 00:28:38.039
it up. She said, send
the kids outside. I need to talk

358
00:28:38.079 --> 00:28:41.079
to you and your brother, me
and your daddy need to talk to y'all.

359
00:28:41.559 --> 00:28:49.119
They got property that Marie didn't even
know they had. Didn't even know

360
00:28:49.240 --> 00:28:55.240
it because they're surviving, they're thriving
in the Philippines. She said, this

361
00:28:55.400 --> 00:28:57.359
is what we want to do.
And Marie, you got to go back

362
00:28:57.400 --> 00:29:02.359
and get your dual citizenship because you're
gonna have to come back here if something

363
00:29:02.400 --> 00:29:07.079
should happen to us, and you've
got to have dual citizenship so they will

364
00:29:07.119 --> 00:29:11.519
have no problems giving you what.
But we're gonna split it right down the

365
00:29:11.599 --> 00:29:15.720
middle, and we're gonna we want
the grandkids to have a legacy. So

366
00:29:15.880 --> 00:29:18.640
they took out a legal path.
Maria head, she said, Miss Gregg,

367
00:29:18.680 --> 00:29:21.839
I was so nervous, she said, but all I can hear was

368
00:29:21.920 --> 00:29:29.359
your voice. You warned me,
You warned me, and I walked right

369
00:29:29.440 --> 00:29:32.480
into it. My parents. Our
parents were ready to have this conversation.

370
00:29:32.720 --> 00:29:36.519
We don't have that sometimes in some
ethnic groups, parents don't want to talk

371
00:29:36.559 --> 00:29:40.160
about that. But the moment they
close their eyes, here come people coming

372
00:29:40.200 --> 00:29:41.279
in the don't no, no,
no, no no no. I'll tell

373
00:29:41.319 --> 00:29:45.480
people now lately locked the house down
after the repass, locket. Once y'all

374
00:29:45.599 --> 00:29:49.680
leave the field possession, locked the
house down, and don't you go back

375
00:29:49.759 --> 00:29:53.839
there. You go to a hotel. While the relatives of in town who

376
00:29:53.960 --> 00:29:59.039
never did anything with you and for
you. This is why I can look

377
00:29:59.119 --> 00:30:03.000
back in my life and I'm so
peaceful like you trade. You're gonna look

378
00:30:03.079 --> 00:30:04.480
back and you're gonna and you're gonna
say, wow, we did it.

379
00:30:06.519 --> 00:30:10.839
We kept our word, We did
it the way both of them wanted us

380
00:30:10.880 --> 00:30:15.319
to do it. And that gives
you such a piece. I've counseled people

381
00:30:15.640 --> 00:30:21.200
who live in that torment every day. And if the parents are have been

382
00:30:21.240 --> 00:30:26.400
golf for fifteen and twenty years because
they didn't treat them right in their last

383
00:30:26.519 --> 00:30:32.279
days. So this is this is
what I mentioned. Church, the Black

384
00:30:32.440 --> 00:30:37.799
Church here in Florida and Center mainly
in Palm Beach County and here in Center

385
00:30:37.880 --> 00:30:45.559
for these are personal stories I know
about where the the former pastor retires,

386
00:30:45.599 --> 00:30:51.440
a younger pastor comes in to take
his place. The first thing they do

387
00:30:52.200 --> 00:30:56.559
is take all the seniors who were
teaching Sunday school, who were helping in

388
00:30:56.880 --> 00:31:02.720
the children's church or in the daycare
part of the church, and set them

389
00:31:02.799 --> 00:31:08.480
down and you honor them once a
year. What you're doing for most of

390
00:31:08.519 --> 00:31:14.079
them, they're they're retired teachers,
they're retired business people. They're retired and

391
00:31:14.240 --> 00:31:18.640
the church activities kept them going.
And the first thing you do before after

392
00:31:18.720 --> 00:31:23.319
you introduce yourself, is sit them
down. So don't think that you could

393
00:31:23.359 --> 00:31:29.119
go to the church and there's active
stuff. The church long has long been

394
00:31:29.240 --> 00:31:33.839
changed over twenty years ago. So
the church is not the resource, but

395
00:31:34.000 --> 00:31:38.799
you can create the resource at the
church. You could you could do a

396
00:31:38.920 --> 00:31:42.119
survey. I'm getting ready to do
a survey and some of my black churches

397
00:31:42.200 --> 00:31:48.200
up here just five questions of their
members. What are your needs? What

398
00:31:48.319 --> 00:31:55.680
are your fears right now? What
are your fears? What are your concerns?

399
00:31:56.279 --> 00:32:00.480
And we're gonna take those, We're
gonna isolate them, and then we're

400
00:32:00.480 --> 00:32:05.160
gonna have a nice little meeting with
some powerheads here and said, do you

401
00:32:05.279 --> 00:32:10.240
know they out of ten churches here
who have at least seventy five of their

402
00:32:10.319 --> 00:32:16.279
congregation is over the age of sixty
five. They're living in fear because they

403
00:32:16.319 --> 00:32:22.039
can't afford the high mortgage. They've
refinanced the house because the kids needed the

404
00:32:22.119 --> 00:32:23.920
money. Now they're about to lose
their house. They're about to be put

405
00:32:24.000 --> 00:32:29.440
out of their home that they've had
for thirty years. I've got somebody very

406
00:32:29.519 --> 00:32:35.359
close to me that just that just
happened, and there's nothing I can do

407
00:32:36.720 --> 00:32:39.599
because the family has stepped in.
You don't want my help. I'm good,

408
00:32:39.960 --> 00:32:45.079
but I'm watching from afar. Over
thirty years, this lady had her

409
00:32:45.160 --> 00:32:51.480
house when nobody was catching the fact
that a memory was kind of going.

410
00:32:52.400 --> 00:32:57.960
She refinanced and did a reverse mortgage
on it. Nobody knows where the money

411
00:32:58.039 --> 00:33:01.559
went. But now a few weeks
ago they moved her out of her house.

412
00:33:07.240 --> 00:33:10.000
Now the bank don't want your money
your house. Just pay them back

413
00:33:10.039 --> 00:33:15.559
what is old to them. And
if you're using wisdom, you could sell

414
00:33:15.599 --> 00:33:19.920
the house and pay the bank back, pay the finance company back. They

415
00:33:19.960 --> 00:33:25.000
don't want to build, they don't
need another building. But because you're greed

416
00:33:25.519 --> 00:33:31.000
and your evilness and everything else.
I'm sorry, but that's real. That's

417
00:33:31.000 --> 00:33:39.039
a real story. I could put
names in that story. So you need

418
00:33:39.119 --> 00:33:44.839
to respect your elders. We've got
to go back to that. And you

419
00:33:44.920 --> 00:33:47.200
don't. Yeah, I know,
you don't come in and uninvited. You

420
00:33:47.400 --> 00:33:52.079
let them know I'm coming over,
even if their memory it comes and goes,

421
00:33:52.119 --> 00:33:53.839
and let me tell you something.
I don't know if Trey, if

422
00:33:53.880 --> 00:33:58.839
you had these moments, but there
were times when my mom with Alzheimer's,

423
00:33:59.400 --> 00:34:04.359
who not called me by my name
in four years, would clear and bring

424
00:34:04.519 --> 00:34:08.559
up a memory, tell you a
story, and it's real, it really

425
00:34:08.639 --> 00:34:14.719
happened. So they're listening. You
never know. They may be out of

426
00:34:14.880 --> 00:34:17.599
they look like they're physically out of
it, but you never know when they're

427
00:34:17.639 --> 00:34:24.960
clearing and they can hear what you're
saying. Be careful because I got twenty

428
00:34:25.440 --> 00:34:30.480
eight scriptures and probably twenty five of
those or where is where God or Jesus

429
00:34:30.639 --> 00:34:35.440
is talking and said, don't you
just don't, don't don't disrespect, don't

430
00:34:35.559 --> 00:34:40.840
mistreat the elderly, even the widow
I became a widow. Maybe one or

431
00:34:40.880 --> 00:34:45.880
two people reached out. Anybody else
reached out. Nobody said, hey,

432
00:34:46.000 --> 00:34:50.039
you know you need me to come
by and cut your lawn? Oh you

433
00:34:50.119 --> 00:34:52.480
need this? And how'd you call
you? You? You're good? No,

434
00:34:53.239 --> 00:35:02.719
had to keep I had to keep
moving. So I call anybody that's

435
00:35:02.760 --> 00:35:09.159
older than me mister or miss.
Still to this day, that's how I

436
00:35:09.280 --> 00:35:13.559
was raised. If you are a
couple of years older than me, miss

437
00:35:13.679 --> 00:35:16.599
miss, mister m Trey isn't.
I'm just gonna use it as an example.

438
00:35:16.679 --> 00:35:20.679
She ain't older than me. I'm
about to round that corner. But

439
00:35:20.840 --> 00:35:27.719
I said, miss Trey, how
you doing today? Okay? Respect?

440
00:35:28.880 --> 00:35:31.440
And this is why God blesses us. He don't go back on his word.

441
00:35:32.679 --> 00:35:35.880
He won't go back on He's not
a man that he would lie.

442
00:35:37.280 --> 00:35:43.079
So it's already in writing. But
you got to be careful. But it's

443
00:35:43.119 --> 00:35:45.639
not too late that resources that trade. Yeah, come on in, because

444
00:35:45.639 --> 00:35:50.679
I'm gonna talk about some creative resources
that you can do for your elderly.

445
00:35:50.800 --> 00:35:53.760
If you have a loved one that's
still you're still trying to keep them home.

446
00:35:54.159 --> 00:35:57.719
Here, let's talk about some things, Trey. Let's go back and

447
00:35:57.800 --> 00:36:00.000
forth. If we have to,
um, you know, what could people

448
00:36:00.119 --> 00:36:04.000
do? What was some of the
creating now like you already said that you

449
00:36:04.480 --> 00:36:09.480
were able to uh, you know, your your work. You could maneuver

450
00:36:09.639 --> 00:36:15.639
that enough to do yeah my worst. Yeah I can maneuver that. But

451
00:36:15.880 --> 00:36:21.000
I think too having having people that
are willing to step in, Hey,

452
00:36:21.079 --> 00:36:23.480
I can do a couple hours,
you know, or I can run the

453
00:36:23.719 --> 00:36:28.920
errand, or I can go you
know, shopping, or you know,

454
00:36:29.000 --> 00:36:30.840
it doesn't even have to be a
phone call and text. How are you

455
00:36:30.960 --> 00:36:35.559
doing? How is your parents all
right? The parents good? How are

456
00:36:35.679 --> 00:36:38.599
you doing? What do you need
to do? What do I need to

457
00:36:38.679 --> 00:36:43.519
help you with? You know,
those things? And then um, maybe

458
00:36:43.599 --> 00:36:47.840
somebody making a dish, taking it
over or just rest it to say hey,

459
00:36:49.079 --> 00:36:52.119
I got this. You go ahead
and get a little woosa from it,

460
00:36:52.480 --> 00:36:57.599
you know, or just little stuff. Doesn't have to be a whole

461
00:36:57.719 --> 00:37:00.480
lot um, you know, it
could be even matter taking out the garbage

462
00:37:00.559 --> 00:37:07.760
camp you know, up, yeah, just clean it. It doesn't it

463
00:37:07.840 --> 00:37:14.760
doesn't take a lot, right right, And company. I'm having company as

464
00:37:14.800 --> 00:37:17.960
well, so you know, if
you if somebody just coming over just say

465
00:37:19.000 --> 00:37:21.800
hey, I just want to just
visit with you and see, you know,

466
00:37:21.880 --> 00:37:25.599
because you don't have the ability to
go out per se, you know,

467
00:37:25.760 --> 00:37:31.239
but maybe just having company old and
hey, I'm bringing out and don't

468
00:37:31.280 --> 00:37:35.480
come to somebody, thank you.
Don't come to somebody house empty handed.

469
00:37:36.880 --> 00:37:38.760
Don't if you got it to do, because there are people who are on

470
00:37:38.880 --> 00:37:45.519
food stamps. M let's go there
and technically if we looked into at your

471
00:37:45.519 --> 00:37:52.280
income tax and tell something different.
So don't an elderly person's house if they

472
00:37:52.320 --> 00:37:55.719
handed take them a bag of grocery. Just take them a bag of grocery.

473
00:37:55.760 --> 00:38:01.400
You got the food stamps. Come
on, that's all it takes.

474
00:38:01.880 --> 00:38:05.599
And they'll tell you I didn't have
to do that. Say it's okay,

475
00:38:05.639 --> 00:38:08.000
but I'm just gonna put these little
portable meals in here so that all you

476
00:38:08.119 --> 00:38:12.039
have to do. I didn't know
what meals on wheels were. I mean,

477
00:38:12.119 --> 00:38:14.840
I use it as a resource,
right, but I didn't know it's

478
00:38:14.880 --> 00:38:17.280
just frozen food. That's a pop
pot. We can go to the frozen

479
00:38:17.320 --> 00:38:22.480
food section to do the same thing. Say exactly, I didn't even know

480
00:38:22.599 --> 00:38:25.639
that. I'm okay, I'm a
social worker. I didn't even know it.

481
00:38:25.719 --> 00:38:29.519
I said, waiting this frozen I
said, oh, this is like

482
00:38:29.599 --> 00:38:34.400
a pot pot here and public is
into the frozen stuff, baked potatoes,

483
00:38:34.480 --> 00:38:37.280
seafood, deluxe salmon, stuffed salmon
and everything. If you though it's about

484
00:38:37.400 --> 00:38:42.440
fifty thousand dollars now, but still
that's something they could take out, put

485
00:38:42.480 --> 00:38:46.039
it in a pan, heat it
up and have a good meal. Exactly.

486
00:38:46.559 --> 00:38:51.559
I'm a good meal exactly. That's
all you have to do. You

487
00:38:51.559 --> 00:38:53.840
ain't got to you know you and
take turns, Go ahead and say,

488
00:38:53.840 --> 00:38:59.000
you know what, I'm gonna seed
my time. Come on, God,

489
00:38:59.679 --> 00:39:06.320
I'm gonna seed a bag of grocery
every week for the next sixty days,

490
00:39:06.960 --> 00:39:09.719
for two months. I'm coming in
to Miss Harriet and I'm bringing a bag

491
00:39:09.760 --> 00:39:14.800
of grocery. She don't have to
ask me for nothing. Well I need

492
00:39:14.840 --> 00:39:15.559
to pay you, no, man, we do not. This is my

493
00:39:15.679 --> 00:39:19.400
seed and this is how to do
it. This, this is my seed

494
00:39:19.760 --> 00:39:22.039
to God. So you can't pay
me back. I'm waiting on him.

495
00:39:22.280 --> 00:39:27.440
That's his job. He'll pay me
back. And if you one, I

496
00:39:27.559 --> 00:39:30.639
think too. You know what,
if you're you know your loved one is

497
00:39:30.679 --> 00:39:36.719
no longer here, anything that could
be used to help another person's loved one,

498
00:39:37.360 --> 00:39:40.119
you know, it could be hospital
bed, It could be cheeks for

499
00:39:40.199 --> 00:39:45.480
the hospital bed. It could be
you know, just something that or productive

500
00:39:45.559 --> 00:39:49.239
feed up or you know, it
could be a wheelchair. You know,

501
00:39:49.360 --> 00:39:53.079
it could be something else that you
know that they didn't have access to,

502
00:39:54.079 --> 00:40:00.360
you know, to protective underwear,
you know that. And so you know,

503
00:40:00.519 --> 00:40:05.159
it's as small things. Give somebody
else, you know, give other

504
00:40:05.239 --> 00:40:07.760
people if you're not going to use
it, just get to other people with

505
00:40:08.280 --> 00:40:13.840
you know. Yeah, makes it
a little easier. Yeah, here,

506
00:40:14.000 --> 00:40:17.119
Salvation Army won't take stuff anymore if
it's over five years old. I've got

507
00:40:17.199 --> 00:40:22.800
my um myum my chair that's a
rising chair, you know, lift chair,

508
00:40:23.599 --> 00:40:25.719
and I've got it in my living
room right because I wanted to get

509
00:40:25.760 --> 00:40:28.800
me another one. I want to
get me a new one because it's a

510
00:40:28.840 --> 00:40:31.320
cloth one. But because of COOMD, they don't take stuff like that anymore.

511
00:40:32.360 --> 00:40:37.599
Check a system and I need to
find maybe a facility that could use

512
00:40:37.679 --> 00:40:40.159
it or whatever, you're right,
and have them come and get it.

513
00:40:40.840 --> 00:40:44.159
But they won't, you know,
but I have boots. I have the

514
00:40:44.239 --> 00:40:47.599
boot that when you know, when
my feet my toes were being amputated,

515
00:40:47.639 --> 00:40:52.159
I had to wear a boot.
But they won't take that. I'm trying

516
00:40:52.159 --> 00:40:58.800
to get my personal you know,
maybe somebody that personal, you know,

517
00:40:59.159 --> 00:41:02.880
may be people know my prosthetic.
People know I've got a root for a

518
00:41:04.000 --> 00:41:07.440
left leg, so left foot,
and it's a good one. I got

519
00:41:07.519 --> 00:41:09.159
two of them as a matter of
fact, you know, and I'm keeping

520
00:41:09.199 --> 00:41:13.039
them because I'm not gonna just give
I mean throw them away. No,

521
00:41:14.079 --> 00:41:16.639
no, no, no, I
definitely got you, Yeah, I definitely

522
00:41:19.559 --> 00:41:23.239
yeah. But it's like little I'm
just like little little stuff that could be

523
00:41:23.360 --> 00:41:28.800
you know, could be lotion or
you know, lotion that was a cream

524
00:41:29.000 --> 00:41:31.920
or something that would stick enough that
you know that you could give somebody,

525
00:41:32.559 --> 00:41:38.440
you know, this little little yeah. Yeah, because even now going forward,

526
00:41:38.519 --> 00:41:42.960
if I give anybody a Christmas gift, it's gonna be what I think

527
00:41:43.039 --> 00:41:45.760
you need. It's not gonna be
something like a sweater or a scarf.

528
00:41:46.000 --> 00:41:50.320
No, It's gonna be little things, little drinks, like you said,

529
00:41:50.440 --> 00:41:53.559
a bottle of good lotion that's got
lavender in it, an aloe in it.

530
00:41:53.719 --> 00:41:55.920
You know. I mean, I'm
gonna pick them up as you know

531
00:41:55.960 --> 00:42:00.440
they're in the little dollars bins or
whatever, or when they are on sale.

532
00:42:00.400 --> 00:42:04.079
I'm a part of the CBS Rewards
Club. I love. I always

533
00:42:04.119 --> 00:42:07.920
thought I love to get paid this
shop. And now I went invested into

534
00:42:07.960 --> 00:42:12.079
the ten dollars gift pass and that
you pay for that like once a year.

535
00:42:12.119 --> 00:42:14.920
You already and pay it back.
But I got your money back because

536
00:42:14.960 --> 00:42:20.159
you get ten dollars off every month, ten dollars free money. So I

537
00:42:20.280 --> 00:42:23.920
go in. I get that,
you know, I think too just just

538
00:42:24.239 --> 00:42:29.559
having like I said, some airphones
maybe. And the reason I'm saying that

539
00:42:29.679 --> 00:42:32.840
because you know, sometimes if you
love want to sleep or napping and you

540
00:42:32.920 --> 00:42:37.440
just want to put some music on
this kind of relaxing to you. You

541
00:42:37.559 --> 00:42:43.719
know that you just hear some of
the meditation music and something that's water sounds,

542
00:42:43.760 --> 00:42:47.440
it's to kind of take you away
from a temporary while allowing you to

543
00:42:47.519 --> 00:42:52.360
still be in the presence of your
loved ones, you know. So it's

544
00:42:52.400 --> 00:42:58.760
definitely a good good thing. You
know. Self care is still important,

545
00:42:59.400 --> 00:43:04.440
don't get us wrong. Self care
is still important, okay, but you

546
00:43:04.639 --> 00:43:08.320
also need to look out for that
aging person. I still I have a

547
00:43:08.400 --> 00:43:15.000
couple of my residents neighbors, actually
my residents, my neighbors here from my

548
00:43:15.760 --> 00:43:19.840
former place where I live, my
condo residential area, and I'm still in

549
00:43:19.920 --> 00:43:25.159
touch with them, and one sends
me a motivational peace every morning if she's

550
00:43:25.239 --> 00:43:29.159
up to it. And I had
to tell her, I appreciate it.

551
00:43:29.239 --> 00:43:31.480
I need that. And she was
surprised because he goes, you don't look

552
00:43:31.519 --> 00:43:36.280
like you need anything. I know
you don't understand. I need that motivation.

553
00:43:36.639 --> 00:43:39.679
I need that to be reminded because
I'm not gonna let everybody know what

554
00:43:39.800 --> 00:43:45.039
I'm going through. You know,
I woke up in pain today and I

555
00:43:45.159 --> 00:43:50.239
think it's and I'm learning that you
don't have athletes who've had fractures or breakage

556
00:43:50.320 --> 00:43:53.440
or stuff. The cold weather or
the rainy weather makes it. But I've

557
00:43:53.519 --> 00:43:58.159
got that. And so I was
like, Lord Jesus, but I can't

558
00:43:58.239 --> 00:44:00.800
I have my prosthetic appointment today.
They're working on my new you know,

559
00:44:00.920 --> 00:44:05.199
my arm with my new censors in
it, and I had to go.

560
00:44:06.079 --> 00:44:07.519
I had to go, but I
was a lymph. I was in pain.

561
00:44:07.599 --> 00:44:10.280
I said, Jesus, I need
you to touch this left knee please,

562
00:44:10.320 --> 00:44:15.440
because I got to keep moving here. You know, but prayer,

563
00:44:15.639 --> 00:44:21.199
praying just because they're eighty nine years
old does not exempt them from a prayer,

564
00:44:21.639 --> 00:44:25.079
does not exempt them from being prayed
for. Let them leave the prayer

565
00:44:27.199 --> 00:44:30.760
you know if you never know in
your conversation, you know, and there's

566
00:44:30.800 --> 00:44:35.679
something New's got some interesting stories.
I would love to be the best writer

567
00:44:35.800 --> 00:44:39.400
for them. Let's let's get let's
turn it into a book. You know,

568
00:44:40.239 --> 00:44:44.719
they're not just because they're sixty nine, sixty eight, seventy eight,

569
00:44:44.880 --> 00:44:49.519
seventy nine, eighty nine, ninety
two, ninety five. You don't put

570
00:44:49.599 --> 00:44:54.159
them out anywhere. Ye still and
if they're still here, there's still some

571
00:44:54.360 --> 00:45:05.000
wisdom that God wants them to impart
or for giveness to occur. And I'm

572
00:45:05.079 --> 00:45:08.480
telling you you will not live in
a night in a nightmare for the rest

573
00:45:08.559 --> 00:45:14.480
of your days because of how you
didn't step in and you didn't provide.

574
00:45:14.840 --> 00:45:17.559
Whatever you can do if you can
hire your home health aids. There are

575
00:45:17.639 --> 00:45:22.639
ten dollars an hour when they're working
at an agency, so you could have

576
00:45:22.760 --> 00:45:28.920
one coming in for two hours,
two times a week. That's ten twenty

577
00:45:29.000 --> 00:45:32.400
thirty, forty forty dollars. You
got three siblings and all of y'all make

578
00:45:32.480 --> 00:45:37.159
six figures. What's wrong with that
picture? What's wrong with that picture?

579
00:45:39.840 --> 00:45:45.480
And those of you who have children
and you know you need after care services

580
00:45:45.880 --> 00:45:50.679
for them. Okay, now this
is gonna get tricky. You don't just

581
00:45:50.800 --> 00:45:54.199
go drop the child. The children
off drip because grandma still got a house

582
00:45:54.760 --> 00:45:57.719
and they could just run around and
make no, no, no. You

583
00:45:57.840 --> 00:46:00.840
teach them how to clean up the
house, if you teach them how to

584
00:46:00.960 --> 00:46:07.519
respect their elders. And you make
sure because I mean, you know you

585
00:46:07.639 --> 00:46:13.000
possibly getting food assistance, you make
sure that this grocery in that house too.

586
00:46:16.559 --> 00:46:22.800
Provision. Stop taking for granted,
to taking advantage of people. Because

587
00:46:22.840 --> 00:46:28.440
I'm telling you, karma is or
you know what, that's the flesh,

588
00:46:28.519 --> 00:46:32.320
that's that's the natural warning. The
spiritual warning is you will greet with you.

589
00:46:32.440 --> 00:46:37.960
So you can have nine kids and
you treated your parents so bad,

590
00:46:38.400 --> 00:46:45.199
not one of them will come to
your aid, not one because they saw

591
00:46:45.239 --> 00:46:52.280
how you treated their grandparents. We
want to encourage you. We just want

592
00:46:52.280 --> 00:46:57.159
to encourage you. We will celebrate
you as you are an older American.

593
00:46:57.719 --> 00:47:01.599
We celebrate you. We stand on
your back. You forged a trail for

594
00:47:01.800 --> 00:47:06.800
us, whether you know it or
not. You provide a history for us

595
00:47:07.639 --> 00:47:10.360
some of us. We have your
DNA, we have your work ethic,

596
00:47:12.000 --> 00:47:15.880
we have your motivational ethic. The
least that I can do the least that

597
00:47:15.880 --> 00:47:22.599
I can do. Let's say thank
you, congratulate you, honor you as

598
00:47:22.719 --> 00:47:27.480
best as I can with what I
have, I can. We can do

599
00:47:27.599 --> 00:47:30.719
that. So we want to encourage
the audience. If you still have a

600
00:47:30.800 --> 00:47:37.280
loved one that's aging, we encourage
you to reach out to them, and

601
00:47:37.440 --> 00:47:42.639
you know they have needs. You
know they have needs, and a lot

602
00:47:42.719 --> 00:47:46.559
of them won't say that they have
needs. So you just go in with

603
00:47:46.719 --> 00:47:51.559
your bag or grocery, pay them
a visit, bring them some fresh flowers.

604
00:47:54.039 --> 00:47:57.840
You may even be able to find
a cleaning company that will give you

605
00:47:58.000 --> 00:48:01.760
a discount because of as an elder. And they come in, they clean

606
00:48:01.800 --> 00:48:07.119
the house, but on a hundred
dollars clean the whole house. You don't

607
00:48:07.159 --> 00:48:15.800
know until you ask, until you
reach out. So do it. Do

608
00:48:15.000 --> 00:48:21.960
it, our older Americans, we
salute you, We honor you, We

609
00:48:22.199 --> 00:48:25.360
pray for you, each and every
one of you. We still need you.

610
00:48:25.480 --> 00:48:30.440
If you're still here and you're in
your seventies and eighties, nineties,

611
00:48:31.280 --> 00:48:36.000
for some reason, we still somebody
still needs you. And it may be

612
00:48:36.159 --> 00:48:42.000
just to impart wisdom into their lives. Trade closes out. We only got

613
00:48:42.079 --> 00:48:45.039
one more minute, we got We
need a lot of wisdom here. We

614
00:48:45.199 --> 00:48:49.760
do need a lot of wisdom and
I think just learning all that you can

615
00:48:49.960 --> 00:48:52.719
from your loved ones, you know, about the past, family history,

616
00:48:53.679 --> 00:48:58.480
but also keeping them safe, you
know, finding a way to secure them

617
00:48:59.280 --> 00:49:01.480
so that no one in the home. You know that you'll be able to

618
00:49:01.559 --> 00:49:05.679
keep an eye on them some way, you know, because there are people

619
00:49:05.800 --> 00:49:08.360
that know what goes on. They
see movement in the household, even some

620
00:49:08.519 --> 00:49:13.119
people you know, your neighbors or
whatever, and it could be a some

621
00:49:13.199 --> 00:49:15.760
people don't live in the best of
neighborhoods, you know, where they watch

622
00:49:15.800 --> 00:49:21.159
out for older folks and have sympathy
and empathy for them. So find a

623
00:49:21.239 --> 00:49:24.679
way to secure them if no one's
gonna be there during a certain time of

624
00:49:24.800 --> 00:49:29.599
the day or not. So they
man got cameras and different ways you can

625
00:49:29.760 --> 00:49:34.519
communicate. So yeah, so that
I think this is a great show.

626
00:49:35.239 --> 00:49:38.360
And uh, and also for caregivers
and stuff. Don't beat yourself up.

627
00:49:38.960 --> 00:49:44.360
You're human. You get frustrated,
so just keep praying. Amen. Well

628
00:49:44.400 --> 00:49:47.920
that's our time. We're gonna have
a replay next week because it's it's Memorial

629
00:49:49.079 --> 00:49:52.000
Day weekend and we know we can't
even get you all attention, so we're

630
00:49:52.039 --> 00:49:54.559
gonna have a replay and you can
only hear it on the radio portions of

631
00:49:55.039 --> 00:50:00.320
Talk for TV and radio, so
you all be blessed. But we will

632
00:50:00.360 --> 00:50:05.960
see you in June, same time, same station. See y'all tonight,

633
00:50:06.519 --> 00:50:59.280
Good night by H.