Domestic Violence Awareness

domestic violence, color purple, awareness vs call to action, economic changes, law, policy
Setting It Straight w/ Ms. Gray is broadcast live Mondays at 7PM ET.
Setting It Straight w/ Ms. Gray TV Show is viewed on Talk 4 TV (www.talk4tv.com)
domestic violence, color purple, awareness vs call to action, economic changes, law, policy
Setting It Straight w/ Ms. Gray is broadcast live Mondays at 7PM ET.
Setting It Straight w/ Ms. Gray TV Show is viewed on Talk 4 TV (www.talk4tv.com).
Setting It Straight w/ Ms. Gray Radio Show is broadcast on W4CY Radio (www.w4cy.com) part of Talk 4 Radio (www.talk4radio.com) on the Talk 4 Media Network (www.talk4media.com).
Setting It Straight w/ Ms. Gray Podcast is also available on Talk 4 Podcasting (www.talk4podcasting.com), iHeartRadio, Amazon Music, Pandora, Spotify, Audible, and over 100 other podcast outlets.
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The topics and opinions express in the
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show hosts. Thank you for choosing W
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FOURCY Radio. Well, good evening, good evening, good evening, and
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welcome to another fabulous opportunity. Dialogue, discussion, narrative, narration and storytelling
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of Setting it Straight with Mss Gray
with the three the two most beautiful.
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I'm gonna say three because I have
to include rebel. Three. We haven't
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seen rebel, but I'm gonna just
trust that. I'm gonna go with my
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instinct. Beautiful, talented, highly
motivated women of all time, all time.
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But before I say give a shout
out to them, let's pray.
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God. We just thank you,
and we praise you. We give you
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glory, for you alone are worth
it to be praised. Set your captives
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free. We hide behind the cross. This is your show. This is
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your time to speak to your people
unlike ever before. In Jesus name,
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we pray, Amen and Amen.
Hello, Trey, Hello Tomey. How
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y'all doing today? How are you
y'all talking at the same time. I
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don't know how y'all do that.
I just I don't know what who said
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what? But you sounds just alike, So I think we will try it
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again. Y'all all right, I'm
good, Thank you so much. Well,
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we give God praise today, and
let's have a moment of silence for
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Israel and what's going on over there. We're just gonna have a moment of
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silence. Thank you. You know, you don't like to hear about real
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war. You don't like to hear
about real war, even though it's been
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prophesied believers, if you've read anything
in your Word, if you've read the
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Bible, if you've been to a
church that really taught the word, this
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is nothing new. We just didn't
know the when. We didn't know the
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how, and we didn't know how
the impact was going to be. And
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we don't know because we don't know
the after effects, the aftermath so let's
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keep our you know, people,
let's just keep Israel in prayer and pray
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that. You know, I don't
even know how to pray about that,
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to be honest with you, I
can only pray God's will and whatever that
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is because you hear so many different
stories coming you know, growing up and
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everything, and you know, and
then you then you finally study the Word
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for yourself and you're like, oh
wow, okay, you know, and
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then it's like, God, I
don't even know how you want me to
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pray for that. I don't know
what you want me to How do you
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want me to pray? You know, because the Bible has to fulfill itself.
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The Bible pass to fulfill itself,
you know. So there's much loss
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every day now aside from that getting
calls or text messages, please pray for
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this family member. People are just
passing away every day here in the states,
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here in Florida, everywhere. They're
either being killed in an accident of
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some sort, or they're being shot
and killed, they're being murdered. I
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mean, just every single day,
somebody a family or the mother in law
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just passed and the uncle passed,
you know, two days from Apart from
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each other. Just I'm hearing it
all. I'm hearing it all. So
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we really need to be prayerful and
have your prayer points and be praying without
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ceasing. And God gave me revelation
about that. I've always been asked.
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I've asked in the past on my
journey, how long do you keep praying
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for something? How long do you
keep? And I've received I've told to
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some you know, spiritually minded people, faith minded people, and I got
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several different answers. You know,
so somebody will say, well, pray
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until you see it manifest, or
pray until you know, you know,
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just pray one time and just believe
God and pray, you know. And
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so I had to find out for
myself what that meant. And the Lord
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just gently laid this in my spirit
just the other day, pray without ceasing.
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That tells me that there should never
be a day, a moment in
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a day that we're not praying simple. We sometimes we take the walk of
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God, the walk of faith,
that make it so complicated and you can't
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even explain it. And because it's
so complex, and God is not a
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complex God, He's very simple.
Just just pray without ceasing and for me
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also a little further pray un to
you believe that it's going to happen.
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Keep praying, not the prayers,
not so much for God to answer,
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but for you to keep praying the
same thing, same request, same what
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concern, until you believe He's gonna
answer, and it's gonna come the past
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and whatever comes to past, it
is God's answer, and you stay at
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it. But but you don't stop
praying until you don't until you believe it.
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When you believe it, why you
need to pray about it. It's
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already in his hands. It's already
in his hands. Well anyway, that's
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that's it. I've got a few
updates. I've been telling you some new
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people who normally don't watch the show
about the three day, three person feeding
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program, God's feeding program for this
month, and they're very everybody I've mentioned
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it too, they're like, oh
my God, Okay, it's it too
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late. Nope, you got to
the thirty first. So we're gonna probably
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next in the next week or two. We're gonn definitely hear from some folk
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and be able to come back and
do that, you know. But God's
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good and I'm just excited what He's
gonna do because you know, the best
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is yet to come. The best
is yet truly to come. So as
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you all know, as some of
you can see, some of us have
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on purple lavender. We're in the
colors spectrum of purple. Because we're gonna
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be talking about domestic violence awareness and
I'm gonna say one little thing and then
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I'm gonna let the ladies come on
in. Just like we've said about awareness,
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Awareness is because nobody seems to be
doing anything about things, so you
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highlight it. I don't know where. I don't know if Trey, you
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have this history of where Domestic Violence
Awareness Month came from. What's the significance
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of October being deemed that you know, to be deemed for that awareness?
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I don't know. And if you
don't have it, you can. We
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got, you know, a couple
of more mondays. You could, you
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know, bring that history to us. But I don't know why they chose
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October. Why was October chosen?
And I think that's gonna be a good
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piece. I'm sorry we didn't bring
this up in our brainstorming session, but
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that's something I think that people would
need to, you know, know,
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because that would make it more personable. Uh, it make it more like,
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oh, okay, okay, that's
where that came from. Is this
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the month that is the highest statistical
rating incidents all over the world? Is
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October a hot month for this?
I've heard everything for over the years.
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But if you can, if you
find something you know, please, you
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know, just hop in and share
that. If not, we can hold
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that, then we can bring that
up next week. Uh, nobody should
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be hitting nobody. Nobody should be
hitting nobody. You be careful with that
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because you know kids will take that
thing and say, looking at mama,
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nobody should be hitting nobody. Well
you know what the sad thing is now
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that goes back to you the way
you raised that child. Because I was
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in publics and I heard this little
boy trying to plead the case why he
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wanted six different cereals, and I
can only walk by. I didn't make
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eye contact with the mother, but
but I noticed she went to the wine
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out also before she left and got
in the line, so I can see
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why. And they did. And
I don't know if it was AARP or
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somebody did say that alcohol, a
purchase of alcohol has spiked in these last
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two months, spiked, So yeah, no, No, depending on how
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you were raised. No. Now, my kids were disciplined. That's a
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whole different story. Has nothing to
do with this time. Domestic violence.
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If you're in a relationship, if
you can't keep your hands to yourself,
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then you don't need to be around
nobody. You just don't. You don't
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need to be You don't need to
be around people, and you don't need
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to be pursuing relationships because you can't
handle yourself. You have no control over
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yourself. You've got unresolved issues,
you've got unforgiveness, you've got whatever you
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saw your you saw it firsthand.
You were traumatized, and for some reason
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you think that that's the best way
I should have known. I was in
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a little trouble forgot what year my
second marriage it was, and I asked
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my husband one night. We were
having a good week that week, so
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I asked him. I said,
I need to ask you a question.
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With your mom and dad would go
at it. I mean hitting frighten with
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frying pants and whatever they can put
their hands on. Whose side did you
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take because he's a mama's boy.
He was a mama's boy, you know.
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Not A series in depth, deep
mama's boy. But he was a
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mama's boy. So I was asking
and he wouldn't answer me. He couldn't
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answer me. He couldn't answer me
because I was I mean, you know,
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this is not no one time hit. This is you know, adultry,
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all kinds of stuff, and this
is weekly fighting, daily fighting,
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and all this kind of stuff.
Whose side would you take? But yet
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you could hit me? You promised
me. I was able to give us
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some food this weekend. I went
to a bridge where some people may be
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taking shelter. I gave two food
meals, drinks, veggies, meat,
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and dessert. Yes, mistay,
who I don't have any I wish I
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had some cleanings. I was able
to give dinner this week. And I've
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told people about this assignment and they're
going to try to get their three and
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tell more people about that country corners. All right, thank you, you
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go. I's gonna bless you guys. We can make our little noise that
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part of anoise. Yes, da
dah da da da da da da da
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da da. There you go,
Thank you God, Thank you guys.
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Oh, God is gonna bless I'm
telling you you just don't know just because
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you purposed the thing to do.
And then you've gone, You've carried it
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out. It was on your agenda, you were planning it. You strategically,
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mister, strategically went to the spot, you know, and the country
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corners you did the same thing,
you know, You strategically went. You
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had it in your mind. Oh
God's gonna blow y'all gonna get all the
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blessings wherever where your states, wherever
you live, you gonna get some blessings
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this bench because we're still under open
heaven and God is gonna bless you.
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And this is how we put a
dickt in hunger. Country has this two
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weeks. Country has done it two
weeks in a row. Two weeks.
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Yes, yes, yes, so
God bless you. Thank you all for
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that. Thank you. But yeah, you know, going back to this,
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and you, I mean you and
you also be careful too when you're
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dating and you're getting real serious in
a relationship and you start asking each other
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those those real hard questions, you
know, and about expectations out of the
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relationship and things like that. This
is for me. The ladies don't have
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to agree. They have no idea
what I'm about to say, but this
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is for me. When a man
has to say to you, a man
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that you're dating has to say to
you. You know, I don't hit
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women. I used to think that
was a cheval chev, you know,
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a chivalry. You know, that
was a real good thing, you know.
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Okay, it came from nowhere.
We weren't talking about it or anything
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like that. All of a sudden, they you know, I don't.
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I'm not gonna hit a woman.
I got sisters. That's a trigger.
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Now, that's a trigger. That's
a yellow flag for me, because that's
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what I was told. That's what
I was assured of. We were just
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friends. I was assured of that. And because you didn't even care,
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We're in front of the kids and
you haul off and hit me because you
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didn't like my decision and didn't come
home that night or whatever. And I
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was like, and I told his
mother, I said, I tell you
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what, if it happens again,
he's going you're going to get a call
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from the hospital. I won't be
calling here, but you will get a
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call from the hospital. And he
tried it once more, but I was
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standing over a boiling pot of rice, specifically, and that was before Medea's
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movie came out. I was raised
by country people. Okay, they will
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take a break, but am I
don't want to make this a happy topic.
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We got to find we got to
find some relief here because times are
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getting hard and they're not going to
Some things are not turning around. It's
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just not meant to be. And
if you cannot control, if you don't
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care, I don't even know what
to call it. Ladies, y'all come
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on in. I'm getting twisted up
here. Okay, let's say we can
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untwist you lisha but one thing about
domestic violence awareness. I think that's my
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passion to bring awareness because it occurs
so often, and you know, we're
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often reading about this person or that
person died at the hands of someone that
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was close to them, that they
were in a relationship or had a relationship
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with. And I think when the
balls down to it, it's communication.
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You know, people are quick to
shoot because you don't know how to use
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your words. People are quick to
hit you don't know how to use your
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words. And I think boiling down
to understanding what is causing you to do
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that. I mean, because people
will say, well, why did you
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know? And I've heard it before, well what made them hit you?
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Doesn't make a difference. They shouldn't
have had the hands on you. I
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don't care what the reason is.
You shouldn't have your hands on you.
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And especially if you're too adult,
you should be able to communicate without that,
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you know, I tell people,
look after a certain age, when
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did you think you were too old
to get a spiking? So if you
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were too old for your parents or
spik you, why you're going to let
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another person do the same thing to
you? And so? But like I
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said, it all boils down to
being able to communicate when you're angry,
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when you're frustrated, when you're overwhelmed, because typically these things lead to the
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mass didviolence if you're not able to
control it, and then enhances by by
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drinking or other substances that alter your
thinking. The same way, A lot
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of times said, well he'd been
drinking or she'd been drinking and she hauled
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off and did that and the other
stuff. Well that person and it's just
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not a bashing. I don't This
is one thing I want to bring awareness.
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If you find yourself that you are
quick tempered, and you notice that
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and people tell you that, and
every time you drink and every time you
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do this, your anger results in
hurting someone either emotionally, mentally, physically,
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whatever the situation is. Just take
us look at yourself, because I
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know abuse produces abusers. So when
I first got in the game, in
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the game doing this learning about it. Typically a young female female watching her
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mother gets abused, nine times out
of ten, she's gonna be with an
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abused partner. An abusive partner.
If the male witnesses the abuse and the
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by the father, nine times out
of ten, he's more likely to become
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an abuser. And so it's not
gonna stop until someone learns to communicate.
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And if you feel like just walk
away from the situation, you know,
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just walk away. And it's on
both parts, and it's on both parts.
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Sometimes people are not agitated to that
point. But at some point you
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got to let it go. If
you're that angry and you feel like you're
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going to result to separate, go
to each neutral corner, for lack of
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a better term, breathe wo saw
and when you're ready, let's talk.
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But we don't even teach communication.
We don't teach that. They don't know
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how to communicate. In the schools, they don't know how to communicating.
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The homes they don't know how to
communicate. In the community. They don't
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know sometimes don't know how to communicate
in the church, you know, these
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places, places of work, you
know, employment, they don't know how
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to communicate. And at some point
there needs to be communication. One on
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one. Listen because you can hear
all day, but you need to listen
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because sometimes if you talking too much
or not listening to what someone's saying,
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you can accuse them of doing things. You know what I mean, It's
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like myscal screw what someone is saying. That's because you want to think that's
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what they're saying. Listen, take
it in, breathe, then response.
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Maybe we can do that or you
know, on one of the shows or
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something. But communication, I think
is a key to a lot of the
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violence that's taking place. When I
was coming up, it wasn't shoot.
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It was put up your dukes and
that both people walked away. You might
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one might have a black eye,
you might have screat but you walked away.
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It wasn't all this shooting and stuff
like that and other folks getting innocent,
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and was one on one and then
after that, let's call it quits,
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and then you were friends the next
day or a couple of days or
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whatever the situation. It was not
any of this, which is ridiculous.
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It is ridiculous because you can't bring
anybody back once you once they're gone,
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and you're watching television and thinking because
you shoot somebody or whatever. These video
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games that are violent, vinegar video
games, you have to watch them with
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some maturity as well. And no, look, this happens on a video
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game, but in real life,
if I do that, this person might
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not get off, get up,
and then you're remorse for when it comes
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time at court because you didn't mean
to do it. Take time to stop,
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think and react versus just act on
impulse. Thank you, tray for
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them and Temmy, I want you
to come in. But you know,
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as you were talking, I had
this. I had a flashback. I
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think it was my first year of
teaching at the Christian College here in Orlando,
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and some of the reports the students
were assigned a writing assignment and it
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would be three to five pages or
whatever. The reports I got back.
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I was like these people and I
would look at the person and I'm like,
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they're not just they just didn't recently
graduate from high school. I'm going
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somewhere with this. I'm like,
my goodness, how did they even get
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out of high school? What were
they taught in school? You can't even
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write a legible paragraph. And these
are people who are older. And when
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you were going back, when you
were talking about the communication piece, we're
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not taught. I hear some of
these teachers. And we've got some great
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teachers out that, don't get me
wrong, but some of these teachers,
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I mean, they're so frustrated.
They're so on the edge, not only
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because it was in the classroom,
but what they left that morning at their
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home and what they have yet to
go back to, and especially if they're
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not you know, their check is
not even paid half the bills and they
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got to go work apart. I
told y'all at the elementary school, the
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kids and twins went to a dollar
went too. When we first got here,
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every teacher but the principal had a
part time job. Even a guid's
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counselor everybody had one. So I
mean, so there's these frustrations. So
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this teacher is trying to get these
benchmarks. Sheer heat. They know what
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they have to do per week.
They've got the lesson plans and stuff like.
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That's how they're being checked. And
all this you added on society is
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adding more frustration into the classroom so
that the kids are missing out on basics.
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We don't even have. We don't
even have cursive writing anymore. We
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don't my son, one of my
sons, like Mike, you like cursive
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if I can't understand it. So
you're communication. We're not even taught communication,
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even on the college level, the
master level, on the doctoral level.
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You should hear how some of my
folks be responded to the professor and
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my concerns you, right, nobody
knows how to talk. Nobody has to
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know. Nobody knows. Oh,
breathing, Breathing can really. Breathing shifts
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your mind for a millisecond. It
calms that brain down when you're inhaling and
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you're focusing on that breath. And
I'm telling you it works. Three breaths,
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three strategic breaths works. I'm telling
you it does. It switches that
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brain from a millisecond so that they
can then you can hear, then you
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can you can focus and for a
minute things are clear for a minute.
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But it also is opposite when you
got all this stimuli, all of this
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going on in your brain. You're
right communication, but nobody's talking. Nobody
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wants to teach, and the church
needs to teach the talk communication skills.
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Every pastor that's got a church still
open today need to have marriage and couple
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counseling opportunities. Have have date not
in the church this and husbands, what
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are you doing? Why is what
are you doing? Separate them, bring
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them back together, do role plays
and things like that, because after a
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while, you've been married for twenty
five years and you're looking at each other
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like what Mike, I'm bored now
the kids are gone and look what I
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And then there was a lady she
had to be Oh my god, you're
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at Public's. She said, cashier. I don't know what I had said,
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but she said, hey, yeah, I had no choice. I
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had to come back to work.
She had to be in her late seventies.
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She had to be. She said, I've retired twice and I still
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had to come back to work.
So societal ills, not to make it
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any better, is going are going
to be here. Okay, so that's
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over there. I can only run
what's in here. I can only do
307
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and put my best foot forward.
And yes, I have to use my
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words sometimes like what But I have
to check myself. The Bible said judge
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yourself so you won't be judged.
Check yourself. If you're not feeling good,
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if you're not being you're not able
to clarify and make sense of some
311
00:25:19.039 --> 00:25:22.759
stuff. Maybe that's not for you
to understand. Leave that over there.
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Who brought it to you in the
first place, because you know a dog
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that will bring a boat will carry
one to And if you're not the person,
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if you're tired of people, I'm
telling you me having my phone off
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these past few weeks, I have
it on mute. I have to look
316
00:25:38.839 --> 00:25:41.759
over there, and if it's singing, I can doze off. Whatever it
317
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was, it's been so peaceful,
and I didn't realize how much it was
318
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messing with my mind. On top
of going to school and not being accepted
319
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into school and not being like because
of your faith. So the world is
320
00:25:56.720 --> 00:26:02.880
gonna do its thing. The world's
gonna do and say, what's your room,
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what's your reason for living? What's
your part in this? And how
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often do you attain to that?
And do you pray for others? I
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00:26:11.240 --> 00:26:15.000
finally had to give it up and
stop being road raging in my car people
324
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gonna eat my pupper if they want
to. So you know what, God,
325
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please keep me safe. I don't
want nobody hitting my car. I
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don't want to be putting taken to
the hospital. I don't want that.
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But you know what, God,
I'm tired of yelling at myself and watching
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these people. Later was doing this
and driving. I'm at a full stop,
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full traffic, like I'm looking in
my rear view. She had the
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phone here not here, in her
hand, and the phone the car is
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still moving. I said, God
help me, Oh my God, Jesus,
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and I could get her attention,
and she just and she stopped.
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I didn't see her top hood,
her hood, I saw her dashboard.
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That's how close she was to me. And I get it. You got
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y'all gotta to clear your minds.
You gotta clear your minds. You got
336
00:27:04.400 --> 00:27:10.680
to because most of these people are
walking around just waiting to erupt, just
337
00:27:10.720 --> 00:27:15.640
like these volcanoes that after one hundred
years, no movement, no nothing.
338
00:27:15.680 --> 00:27:18.440
They people walk by and laugh.
Then they hasn't erupted and know it.
339
00:27:18.559 --> 00:27:22.920
Forty years, fifty years, one
hundred years volcano. Say okay, I
340
00:27:22.000 --> 00:27:26.119
got something such I got something for
you that and when it comes, it
341
00:27:26.200 --> 00:27:33.359
comes out and it destroys everything miles
around. That's how we are when we
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00:27:33.400 --> 00:27:37.880
can't, when we just burst.
You're so full, and we talked,
343
00:27:37.920 --> 00:27:41.599
we've been on the show. Try
to give you our ideas of how to
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00:27:41.640 --> 00:27:47.640
calm down. You can't change the
world, get that out of your mind,
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but you could do your part.
Every night I go to bed,
346
00:27:51.000 --> 00:27:55.400
I've done my part and I don't
even even left my house. I'm praying
347
00:27:55.440 --> 00:28:00.480
for somebody. I'm answering. I'm
responding to something I did. I do
348
00:28:00.519 --> 00:28:04.799
my part every day. Do your
part every day, and just you know,
349
00:28:06.039 --> 00:28:10.000
just just y'all got it's getting worse. It's not gonna get any better.
350
00:28:10.480 --> 00:28:15.480
They just made the announcement social Security
increase for January. Everybody, Oh
351
00:28:15.559 --> 00:28:19.640
yeah, but Medicare gonna take the
three percent. Yeah, we're gonna get
352
00:28:19.640 --> 00:28:23.480
a three percent raise. It's gonna
be in writing, but Medicare will take
353
00:28:23.519 --> 00:28:30.920
the three percent. So calm down, figure out how you gonna do this.
354
00:28:32.079 --> 00:28:37.440
Now, stop living robbing Peter to
paper people. This past week more
355
00:28:37.480 --> 00:28:41.960
people are living in their cars.
They passed right by me. I said,
356
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oh my god, everything is in
the car, packed up windows.
357
00:28:44.680 --> 00:28:47.119
You can't see nothing. I said, oh God, they're living out of
358
00:28:47.160 --> 00:28:52.720
the car. But some have found
peace with that. They don't have to
359
00:28:52.759 --> 00:28:53.960
pay no rent. They ain't got
to come up with all this money.
360
00:28:55.079 --> 00:28:56.240
They can go over here to take
a shower, they can go over here
361
00:28:56.240 --> 00:29:00.000
to pick up their mail. They
can go over here on Tuesday nights.
362
00:29:00.079 --> 00:29:03.599
Thursday nights, some restaurants have kids
eat under ten or under eight or under
363
00:29:03.599 --> 00:29:06.799
five eat free. I mean,
they got it all down pat and they
364
00:29:06.839 --> 00:29:11.680
are happy. Are I love those
people because they're not gonna take nothing out
365
00:29:11.720 --> 00:29:18.039
on anybody. They've made a decision
and they're standing on it. But being
366
00:29:18.160 --> 00:29:26.279
angry and walking around just you don't
have a headache, your body physically will
367
00:29:26.319 --> 00:29:30.279
start to respond to that, and
you need to stop. Look at that
368
00:29:30.359 --> 00:29:33.599
again. That little thirteen year old
boy two weeks ago run it if you
369
00:29:33.599 --> 00:29:40.000
see run into the car knowing where
the gun was and thought that that's the
370
00:29:40.039 --> 00:29:42.160
best way over. I still don't
know what was to deal with the back
371
00:29:42.200 --> 00:29:47.960
of potato chips. Did they take
the last brand that he liked? Did
372
00:29:47.960 --> 00:29:49.480
they snatch it out of it?
Because you know how kids are, they're
373
00:29:49.519 --> 00:29:52.319
playing and tuggling or whatever. Did
they snatch it. I don't even know
374
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what happened, but all we know
it was over a back of potato chips.
375
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And when you look at the footage, that boy is looking turning back
376
00:30:00.119 --> 00:30:03.559
and when he wasn't turning to see
who was coming after me, I don't
377
00:30:03.599 --> 00:30:04.720
know. And the mother was right
off to the side, so she saw
378
00:30:04.839 --> 00:30:08.559
him run by. She don't know, have no idea what's on his mind,
379
00:30:08.799 --> 00:30:11.640
opens the car, She don't know
nothing. Until he turns around and
380
00:30:11.680 --> 00:30:17.279
that gun is pointed. He didn't
run and do this. The gun was
381
00:30:17.279 --> 00:30:19.920
pointed when he turned around, and
she's like trying to catch him, and
382
00:30:21.039 --> 00:30:27.960
he was already shooting. So let's
talk. Let's interview him. How how?
383
00:30:29.240 --> 00:30:33.480
Why? What? How? Why
do you? Why did you feel
384
00:30:33.519 --> 00:30:38.000
that getting the gun was gonna resolve
everything? But all of those people out
385
00:30:38.039 --> 00:30:41.559
there, I could see. It
was an empty street and it was just
386
00:30:41.680 --> 00:30:44.519
you and your homeboy, your little
boy, you know, your little friends,
387
00:30:44.720 --> 00:30:47.480
just the two the three of y'all
walking and you got mad and you
388
00:30:47.480 --> 00:30:51.799
saw your mama car. I don't
know. He was not thinking, he
389
00:30:51.880 --> 00:30:55.039
had he didn't care. And then
in court he's crying, like, y'all
390
00:30:55.079 --> 00:31:00.559
need to let me go. I
know I go all over the place and
391
00:31:00.599 --> 00:31:03.319
I'm sorry. That's the social worker
and be sorry about that, guys,
392
00:31:03.599 --> 00:31:08.640
but you gotta y'all got to take
responsibility. You've got to forgive. You
393
00:31:08.720 --> 00:31:11.440
gotta let it go. If it
didn't happen the way you needed to,
394
00:31:11.799 --> 00:31:15.640
maybe it wasn't meant to be.
Now you need to look at how can
395
00:31:15.680 --> 00:31:18.480
I change this? Okay, I
can't go back at you. I play
396
00:31:18.599 --> 00:31:21.359
Solitaire and I was like, oh, oh, okay, that didn't do.
397
00:31:22.079 --> 00:31:23.839
But I keep hitting the redo button
and it said, no, it's
398
00:31:23.880 --> 00:31:27.079
gonna be supposed to solve this one. This is not no. You know
399
00:31:27.240 --> 00:31:30.160
this is not unsolvable. You got
to solve it. So I go back
400
00:31:30.200 --> 00:31:33.400
and I retraced my steps. I
said, no, I'm not gonna move
401
00:31:33.400 --> 00:31:36.920
that car, and I move this
car, and usually I get my It's
402
00:31:36.920 --> 00:31:40.279
just like a what you call it
a maze. You know, I can't
403
00:31:40.319 --> 00:31:42.799
go that way. I'm gonna go
this way. I don't know, Tommy,
404
00:31:42.880 --> 00:31:49.680
talk to us. Well. I
want to say, first, like
405
00:31:49.759 --> 00:32:00.319
you said, train in unisons,
you gotta be slow to speak, think
406
00:32:00.359 --> 00:32:07.359
about before you speak, because a
lot of times if you don't think about
407
00:32:07.480 --> 00:32:12.559
what you're saying, you'll take that
same idea that young man thirteen year old
408
00:32:12.599 --> 00:32:15.559
did and act before he even thought
about what he was about to do.
409
00:32:16.599 --> 00:32:22.319
Where would he be at today if
he didn't make that decision. You'll be
410
00:32:22.480 --> 00:32:29.599
home, but you're not home now
and you probably won't see home for a
411
00:32:29.880 --> 00:32:38.119
very long time. And unfortunately Mama, daddy or grandmama or whoever to try
412
00:32:38.160 --> 00:32:43.640
to get you out on a bond, they got to give up a whole
413
00:32:43.640 --> 00:32:46.599
lot, and they got to pay
a whole lot because you got to have
414
00:32:46.640 --> 00:32:55.000
an attorney, and they're not cheap. Our paychecks don't increase, but everybody
415
00:32:55.039 --> 00:33:01.680
else fees increase. Just like you
said with Medicare, Medicai gonna get at
416
00:33:01.720 --> 00:33:07.640
three percent, but Medicaid, medication
something doesn't hyped more than three percent.
417
00:33:09.359 --> 00:33:17.680
So you're gonna feel that. And
when you were saying about communication, social
418
00:33:17.759 --> 00:33:27.200
media takes communication. When you look
at social media, everybody hand is down.
419
00:33:29.359 --> 00:33:32.440
You can't you see people walking across
the street and they had they don't
420
00:33:32.480 --> 00:33:38.839
even know whether they say walk or
stop. They had down. I remember
421
00:33:38.880 --> 00:33:45.440
one time we were we had went
to a run in Saint Augustine and we
422
00:33:45.519 --> 00:33:49.160
went to eat and crack a barren
we had to wait. We were sitting
423
00:33:49.200 --> 00:33:54.119
on the little s like swing outside
the door, and I don't know,
424
00:33:54.279 --> 00:34:00.119
I think we were looking for something, and so we were all googling and
425
00:34:00.119 --> 00:34:04.559
then everybody had them down and a
man came say, put them phones down,
426
00:34:04.559 --> 00:34:10.280
and y'all just talk. Not that
he knew what we were doing,
427
00:34:12.239 --> 00:34:20.480
but it's just the point of everybody
head down if we take time to communicate,
428
00:34:22.320 --> 00:34:28.719
slow, slow to speak for quick
to listen. And like my aunt
429
00:34:28.800 --> 00:34:34.239
always say, God gave us two
ears, but it gave you one mouth.
430
00:34:36.199 --> 00:34:43.320
So that means you should hear more
and speak less. And it's easy
431
00:34:43.440 --> 00:34:49.760
to say that. But society,
our parents, like you said, our
432
00:34:49.760 --> 00:34:58.159
parents need to take responsibility for our
kids. Nobody's teaching them anymore. And
433
00:34:58.239 --> 00:35:04.280
you are right. There's a lot
of kids gon fall through the cranks because
434
00:35:04.320 --> 00:35:10.559
they have made it so difficult for
the teachers to retain because that child don't
435
00:35:10.599 --> 00:35:19.000
know A to B or even adding
three sets and you know three numbers top
436
00:35:19.039 --> 00:35:25.639
and bottom. They're trying to teach
a multiplication. But parents, I tell
437
00:35:25.800 --> 00:35:32.000
anybody, teacher starts at home.
It don't start with the teacher, It
438
00:35:32.039 --> 00:35:37.159
starts with the parents. Were the
one brought them in. We're the one
439
00:35:37.199 --> 00:35:43.960
responding that teacher is not responsible for
that child. We are. So we
440
00:35:44.039 --> 00:35:51.599
gotta start teaching first, leading by
example, like you said, if Mama
441
00:35:52.000 --> 00:35:55.960
Dayton, or mama married, or
dad and Mama dad learn to talk to
442
00:35:57.039 --> 00:36:01.039
each other and not Yale, because
that child becomes the product of his environment.
443
00:36:05.639 --> 00:36:09.599
And when they become a product of
their environment, Yes, the girl
444
00:36:09.679 --> 00:36:14.159
gonna think I am supposed to be
here because that's how my mama was.
445
00:36:14.480 --> 00:36:16.320
The boy gonna say, yeah,
I'm supposed to hear because that's what my
446
00:36:16.400 --> 00:36:25.079
daddy did. We are a product
of our environment and not realizing with teaching
447
00:36:25.119 --> 00:36:31.480
them the wrong things instead of the
things they need to be taught. And
448
00:36:31.519 --> 00:36:37.719
if we just take the time like
like you, like Trey saying, who
449
00:36:37.880 --> 00:36:45.559
saw breathe? And I noticed a
lot of schools I go in now in
450
00:36:45.639 --> 00:36:52.800
the morning, they do what they
call the calmness and trying to introduce the
451
00:36:52.840 --> 00:36:59.679
three breath breathing, closing your eyes, meditating on something that you think is
452
00:36:59.679 --> 00:37:04.679
your happy place, what makes you
calm, what makes you smooth? And
453
00:37:04.719 --> 00:37:09.519
I love one class I went to. She had two little boys, and
454
00:37:09.559 --> 00:37:13.039
she told'em, she said,
trust me, you gonna know it exactly
455
00:37:13.079 --> 00:37:16.039
who they are. I'm not gonna
even point'em out to you. But
456
00:37:16.119 --> 00:37:22.920
she had a little sofa on the
side and it was a a being with
457
00:37:23.480 --> 00:37:29.599
toys. She said, they're allowed
to come sit on the sofa and get
458
00:37:29.679 --> 00:37:35.519
one toy so they can calm down. And one of the little boys he
459
00:37:35.599 --> 00:37:40.800
went and the and the parather professional
said, are you okay, And I'm
460
00:37:40.840 --> 00:37:46.719
not gonna call no child name,
and he said, yes, I needed
461
00:37:46.760 --> 00:37:52.559
to calm down, and he said
then he got back up and went to
462
00:37:52.599 --> 00:37:57.920
his seat and continued to do what
they were doing at their station. But
463
00:37:58.960 --> 00:38:05.360
so many adults could learn from that, and it's so important they listen to
464
00:38:05.400 --> 00:38:10.719
what you said. Tree. You
got to relax, You got to find
465
00:38:10.800 --> 00:38:20.440
your calmness. You got to find
a way not to errupt, because eruption
466
00:38:20.880 --> 00:38:27.119
brings on. This little boy thirteen
gonna be in a jail cell for how
467
00:38:27.239 --> 00:38:31.199
I don't know how many years.
It's gonna end up with his mama going
468
00:38:31.239 --> 00:38:38.039
to jail too, because she gotta
be the responsible party not having that in
469
00:38:38.119 --> 00:38:44.440
a secure place or a lock down
where he couldn't get his hand on it.
470
00:38:45.039 --> 00:38:52.639
We gotta take responsibility of our actions. So you know, my heart
471
00:38:52.760 --> 00:39:00.559
goes out to families like that.
But you didn't think, and you know,
472
00:39:00.079 --> 00:39:05.400
we think kids are not paying us
any attention, but they watching every
473
00:39:05.719 --> 00:39:15.840
step we make, They watching every
word we speak. He don't seen something
474
00:39:15.880 --> 00:39:19.960
to that effect, whether it be
a game, whether it be in a
475
00:39:20.079 --> 00:39:25.360
movie, whether it happen at home, across the street on this corner,
476
00:39:25.800 --> 00:39:31.400
he don't seen that happen. And
I guess he figured that's if we're getting
477
00:39:31.599 --> 00:39:39.119
justice over a bag of chips,
baby, And how did Who's to say
478
00:39:39.320 --> 00:39:47.599
that Mama couldn't have bought him more
bags of chips. So it's just one
479
00:39:47.639 --> 00:39:55.880
of those things that we just got
to sit back and find that good spot
480
00:39:57.000 --> 00:40:05.840
for ourselves, knowing how to deal, communicate, and present in the proper
481
00:40:05.920 --> 00:40:12.920
way because the children of today are
seeing so much corruption and it's amazing what's
482
00:40:12.960 --> 00:40:19.039
on TV. I still don't care
for TV because there's so much corruption on
483
00:40:19.119 --> 00:40:27.199
TV. So that's my word is
to learn to communicate, be careful what
484
00:40:27.239 --> 00:40:32.559
you're exemplifying for these kids to pick
up, because they're just like magnets or
485
00:40:34.599 --> 00:40:38.840
vacuum cleaner. What they see,
that's what they take in and I just
486
00:40:39.360 --> 00:40:45.679
wanted to piggyback. What you said
to Tommy just made me think of something.
487
00:40:45.840 --> 00:40:49.440
So, you know, working in
this field or background with the mess
488
00:40:49.440 --> 00:40:53.239
of violence. You know, I
had a lady tell me that she felt
489
00:40:53.280 --> 00:41:00.320
that their partner loved her because he
hit her, and so the association with
490
00:41:00.840 --> 00:41:05.719
the abuse and love. You know, you do this because you care or
491
00:41:05.800 --> 00:41:08.519
I do this because I care about
you and stuff that that's that's not And
492
00:41:08.719 --> 00:41:13.880
and I just want to just kind
of put this out there because the massive
493
00:41:13.960 --> 00:41:19.639
violence is rising and it's you know, doesn't seem to be going anywhere.
494
00:41:19.679 --> 00:41:25.199
But I want to put out a
challenge to folks that would in an environment
495
00:41:25.360 --> 00:41:30.599
for your family to be in that's
safe, that feels safe, that's secure.
496
00:41:30.559 --> 00:41:35.639
Wouldn't that be a benefit? What
would be what would be harmful?
497
00:41:36.159 --> 00:41:40.159
If you learn more about what domestic
violence is? Is that going to be
498
00:41:40.280 --> 00:41:45.280
so hard to learn that? You
can do it at your own leisure.
499
00:41:45.360 --> 00:41:49.599
You can google it, you can
go on a national coalition against the massive
500
00:41:49.679 --> 00:41:54.400
violence and and and look at some
of the information that they have and then
501
00:41:54.760 --> 00:42:00.599
learn about what the symptoms and signs
of it and those who are potential abusers
502
00:42:00.760 --> 00:42:07.079
or those who are you know,
who are in are the aggressor in the
503
00:42:07.239 --> 00:42:09.000
relationship. Let me put it that
way, because I'm really trying to be
504
00:42:09.079 --> 00:42:14.920
sensitive because I don't want people to
feel that we're bashing. But to create
505
00:42:14.960 --> 00:42:19.719
an environment where your family can thrive. It cannot do that in an environment
506
00:42:19.760 --> 00:42:23.320
at home where there's spear, where
there's you know, worry about saying things
507
00:42:23.360 --> 00:42:28.960
or cooking the wrong things, or
you know, assumptions and jealousy and all
508
00:42:29.000 --> 00:42:32.639
this stuff. Learn about what it
is and then find a different way to
509
00:42:32.719 --> 00:42:37.800
deal with your your significant other.
And now it used to be more male
510
00:42:37.960 --> 00:42:42.480
and female and stuff. Now it's
other stuff that comes in the play.
511
00:42:42.760 --> 00:42:47.079
You know, where you have same
sex relationships, those things, whatever relationship
512
00:42:47.159 --> 00:42:52.519
you are in, just learn about
it. There's information out there. You're
513
00:42:52.559 --> 00:42:54.920
on your phone, if you use
your phone, just google the information.
514
00:42:55.400 --> 00:43:00.679
And if you're the person that is
the aggressor, just say a difference I
515
00:43:00.719 --> 00:43:05.760
can make if I start with me, I recognize that I do this because
516
00:43:05.760 --> 00:43:08.480
it's a cycle. It's the honeymoon
cycle. Is a sorry, I'm sorry
517
00:43:08.519 --> 00:43:12.960
to mean to do this. But
if you know you have to say sorry,
518
00:43:13.880 --> 00:43:16.880
but you feel you need to say
sorry, find out more about this.
519
00:43:17.199 --> 00:43:20.639
You can do it at your own
discretion and no one has to know,
520
00:43:20.679 --> 00:43:24.719
but just understand that and the impact
that it has on children in community.
521
00:43:24.800 --> 00:43:30.360
So that's that's what I want to
put out there, the full amen.
522
00:43:30.440 --> 00:43:35.639
I just googled real quick, domestic
violence incidents have increased zero point three
523
00:43:35.719 --> 00:43:44.239
percent in eleven cities. And then
it looks like Oklahoma. A new study
524
00:43:44.360 --> 00:43:50.960
just came out the Oklahoma first in
the nation for something for domestic violence rating.
525
00:43:51.760 --> 00:43:58.760
They're saying that forty nine women and
forty point seven percent of Oklahoma men
526
00:43:59.079 --> 00:44:08.920
have either or are currently experiencing domestic
balance. Oklahoma, the Bible belts looking
527
00:44:09.199 --> 00:44:12.880
stop it. You gotta take responsibility. Go ahead, tell me. I'm
528
00:44:12.920 --> 00:44:19.639
sorry. I just say what can
you say? And it starts to you
529
00:44:19.639 --> 00:44:23.719
know, I go back to this
faith based because people go there to people
530
00:44:23.760 --> 00:44:31.039
trust the spiritual leaders to lead them
and guide them. But I'm sending this
531
00:44:31.199 --> 00:44:36.599
plea out too. If you are
head of a ministerial or if you're a
532
00:44:37.440 --> 00:44:44.880
pastor or clergy or something, learn
about it. Get all the information because
533
00:44:44.920 --> 00:44:50.639
people will come to you first seeking
and you, as the head of a
534
00:44:50.719 --> 00:44:54.119
church or head of a ministry.
If you do and say the wrong thing,
535
00:44:54.360 --> 00:44:59.800
you can send somebody back into it, into to the death and it's
536
00:44:59.840 --> 00:45:02.519
not trying to minimum and you can
send them to their death because you don't
537
00:45:04.199 --> 00:45:09.280
really know, you know, what's
happening behind closed doors. And so presenting
538
00:45:09.440 --> 00:45:16.719
having opportunities outside of domestic violence awareness
about to present these things communication. You
539
00:45:16.719 --> 00:45:21.559
know, I'm pretty sure that there's
organizations out there, nonprofits that will be
540
00:45:21.760 --> 00:45:25.280
eager for someone and do a free
one. It doesn't always have to be
541
00:45:25.400 --> 00:45:30.559
that pain, but it'll be worth
the difference that pain because you might be
542
00:45:30.639 --> 00:45:35.920
saving someone who's sitting in your congregation, someone that you passed, or someone
543
00:45:35.960 --> 00:45:40.360
that you minister to. You don't
know that, but have it on hand.
544
00:45:44.679 --> 00:45:46.880
Yeah, I just look down a
little further. And as of June
545
00:45:46.960 --> 00:45:53.440
twenty eighth, the Journal of Emergency
Medicine said that domestic violence has increased twenty
546
00:45:53.440 --> 00:45:59.599
five to thirty three percent globally between
the years of twenty twenty and twenty twenty
547
00:45:59.679 --> 00:46:08.000
one. And now we've got second
generations, third generations coming into this world.
548
00:46:08.079 --> 00:46:12.880
Let's forget that not let's go back
to the baby being in the womb.
549
00:46:12.920 --> 00:46:16.320
Because scientists don't know what comes first
is the hearing. Is it the
550
00:46:16.400 --> 00:46:20.719
smell, you know? But the
baby, they've been able to say,
551
00:46:20.760 --> 00:46:25.360
the baby can hear and it feels
the pulsation of that heartbeat, of the
552
00:46:25.360 --> 00:46:32.800
mother's heartbeat. So can you imagine
a baby hearing? And I want to
553
00:46:32.880 --> 00:46:38.440
quickly say, share something a family
member went through something. I had a
554
00:46:38.440 --> 00:46:43.519
little baby, and the baby really
came in this world struggling and for a
555
00:46:43.599 --> 00:46:49.960
reason. But I woke up and
I heard this little voice saying, I
556
00:46:50.000 --> 00:46:52.559
want to come home. I just
want to come home. She's not gonna
557
00:46:52.599 --> 00:46:58.039
love me. She's not gonna love
me. They talk about me, she
558
00:46:58.199 --> 00:47:00.079
talks about me, And I'm like, I'm waking up, and I'm like,
559
00:47:01.280 --> 00:47:04.280
okay, I'm at my sister.
I'm listening. I'm like, is
560
00:47:04.280 --> 00:47:10.440
this somebody talking? Long story short, It was the baby that was not
561
00:47:10.599 --> 00:47:17.920
even two three months old and an
incubator because of its issues, talking to
562
00:47:17.960 --> 00:47:24.320
God, telling God they're not gonna
love me, They're not gonna be able
563
00:47:24.320 --> 00:47:30.440
to take care of me. I
just want to come home. She said
564
00:47:30.519 --> 00:47:32.159
this about me, and she and
I knew who she was talking about.
565
00:47:32.400 --> 00:47:36.599
It's three or four people involved,
and I knew the adults said that that
566
00:47:37.039 --> 00:47:39.159
little voice was saying no. She
said she you know, you shouldn't have
567
00:47:39.199 --> 00:47:43.519
gotten pregnant, and you brought an
embarrassment on the family, and you should
568
00:47:44.039 --> 00:47:45.920
And I'm just, I just I
couldn't do move. I couldn't because I
569
00:47:45.920 --> 00:47:51.920
had never experienced that before. But
I was awakened to this dialogue, this
570
00:47:52.079 --> 00:48:00.320
conversation between this newborn baby and God. And so that that told me from
571
00:48:00.320 --> 00:48:02.760
then on, Okay, the baby's
the dembre of that baby can hear.
572
00:48:04.159 --> 00:48:08.719
Once it's form and formulating and it's
moving around, it can hear. It
573
00:48:08.840 --> 00:48:17.960
can hear. The Lord brought her
home. Thank your country. The Lord
574
00:48:19.000 --> 00:48:22.199
brought her home. But there was
a there was a there, but she
575
00:48:22.880 --> 00:48:27.920
her life a few months with us. Really I could preach on it.
576
00:48:28.679 --> 00:48:34.519
I could preach because she grew.
She grew despite the odds, despite the
577
00:48:34.599 --> 00:48:39.039
odds. So my whole point of
sharing that I believe, is to let
578
00:48:39.119 --> 00:48:46.599
you know it starts with you a
parent. Relatives. You know, we
579
00:48:46.760 --> 00:48:51.559
laugh at Ada movies, but they're
so true, especially the family reunion.
580
00:48:52.960 --> 00:48:55.119
Go to the family reunion. If
you want to see how that family is
581
00:48:55.159 --> 00:48:59.519
and what you're getting ready to marry
into. Go to the family reunion.
582
00:49:00.320 --> 00:49:04.400
You're gonna hear the gossip. You're
gonna see that anybody's got addictions. Oh
583
00:49:04.519 --> 00:49:07.519
no, Missy, don't cry,
thank you, thank you. She's she's
584
00:49:07.880 --> 00:49:13.079
fine now, she's home, she's
with she's the angels are celebrating her every
585
00:49:13.159 --> 00:49:17.239
day. Don't don't cry, Missy. God I do it through the airwaves.
586
00:49:17.280 --> 00:49:22.480
Oh my god, I don't like
that. Well, thank you,
587
00:49:22.559 --> 00:49:25.000
Mistery and country. This is This
tells us what we need to be praying
588
00:49:25.039 --> 00:49:30.199
about. We need to be praying
about it. I mean, your your
589
00:49:30.199 --> 00:49:34.760
prayer points probably a list of ten
or more things to pray about. And
590
00:49:34.800 --> 00:49:38.519
when you find yourself feeling down and
lo pray for somebody else. Pray for
591
00:49:38.559 --> 00:49:44.039
the situation. Pray for your neighbor. There's always an issue, there's always
592
00:49:44.079 --> 00:49:46.440
somebody that can use prayer. I
know that I can. Our time is
593
00:49:46.559 --> 00:49:50.719
up, and I'm hoping. I'm
gonna close up. I'm gonna close thats
594
00:49:50.760 --> 00:49:54.719
can, Missy. We're gonna celebrate
because we know what it means to love
595
00:49:55.239 --> 00:50:00.280
and to be prayerful, and we
want peace throughout this nation and through wap
596
00:50:00.320 --> 00:50:04.559
this world. We will see y'all
next week, same time, same station.
597
00:50:05.000 --> 00:50:58.000
Good night, everybody,












































